It's not my style anyway, especially when I seek input or opinions - but I am throwing the door wide open here for opinions and input with no backlash whatsoever - all I ask is that side tangents not stray from the point - I'll take input from everyone/anyone, because essentially, I"m in need of polling the masses.

I've noticed some threads lately that touch on the issue of whether fantasy while masturbating is any different than using porn for masturbation. For the most part, I tend to think they are, but with some differences that tend to be spawned by the individual's inner workings.

Now I remember why I liked that 45 day total celibacy period last winter - I've been clean (solo/joint abstinent) for about ten days now - I've got my motivation back, my focus back - hell, I've got ME back. I might even be able to communicate clearly without biting sarcasm either directed at myself or my spouse by reference - I usually get that crap outta muh noggin here, since the communication about physical relationship here is nonexistent despite my years of effort.

Since I was asked to relay a form of breath matching or breath coaching as a non-sexual bonding behavior, I’ll try to relay how it was done, and how it worked. There’s a basic, and a more physical/intimate form of it, both tried and worked well in the time period/atmosphere involved.

I made a comment that I felt there were distinct differences in my perception of hangover following a joint sexual episode with my spouse, versus a retreat to the solo bubble events, whether a one time or a bubble binge. As with us all - I can only describe the viewpoint from my perspective/perception.

Ugh - the physical effects I'd forgotten since hadn't binged in so long - headache, sleep schedule totally bolloxed up, heartburn, a struggle to focus at work. I'm behind on many things, including responses here.

I am not going to kid myself - while my recent return to aversion bubble solo binge behavior is not of the magnitude that such binges often were in the past, I am essentially guilty of binge behavior in the form of 3 episodes over the weekend - the 3rd was Sunday (yesterday), and therefore I am little more than 24 hours out of the last episode. Yes, I know that some times for many of us even a day or two - or even a few hours sometimes - is a success/positive step.

Now that I've actually stuck my head back out of my shell, I'll try not to make a post that requires trilogy (or more) status. I'm not sure Peter Jackson would touch this one with a ten foot pole.

Man - I can't believe I've lasted this long without flying solo - this is the second longest I've ever made it without any form of orgasm, be it masturbation, wet dream, or some form of sexual interaction (9 weeks, once, years ago, then now, then we're talking typically at best 2 weeks typical since late bloomer me figgered out how to do it myself at age 16 lol). Libodo's really intense, but not aggressively so. Last night was a smoother exchange for the post-therapy localized/pain relief exchange.

I'm still clean, but it's been a rocky 36 hours. Had a little further conversation, in which she made it very clear (almost adamantly) that she's wanting physical activity to resume. And the shoulder angel's having to work hard to out talk the shoulder demon. The thoughts:

Mine - intensely sexual in general, non stop visuals of doing things with her.