Brenmal's blog

What you are is not the voice in your head (your ego) but you are the being above the ego, the one watching the thoughts in your mind come to mind and pass away - the one watching and noticing the thoughts that your brain throws up constantly.

By focussing on the moment, on your breath, and not thinking you can get in touch with this inner body, this natural intelligence inside yourself. You will feel more connected with your true self and more able to cope with and control the ego, banishing its stranger suggestions into touch.

Has anyone seen that film Kinsey? I did the other day and I really enjoyed it. I'd recommend it to anyone that uses this site. It's entertaining and informative. Evidently it came out in 2004 and I missed it.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0362269/

Overcoming Addictions by Using Natural-high Visualisation Techniques

A few years ago I heard about a medical doctor in New York who helped drug addicts overcome their addictions by putting them into a trance and teaching their bodies to create the response to the drug. Once they learned the technique, they were able to get 'high' naturally. Since they now realized it was their body that was making them feel so good and not the drugs, it became progressively easier for them to wean themselves off their chemical dependency.

Here's how it works.

If you've been reading my blogs you will know that in recent months I have become increasingly interested in psychology. I have read books that look into the work of Bandler and Grinder, the fathers of NLP. At the moment I am reading some books by Paul McKenna. One of them is called Change Your Life in Seven Days, and although such a title may put some cynical people off I have been very impressed by the techniques that Paul uses. I am very much into the power of neurolinguistic programming and hypnotism.

I've read many of your comments and kept coming back to this website to help myself. I don't really understand what all this fuss about segregating the site is all about. I've always just read the headers I was interested in and I guess most of you do too. What I'm amazed about is that it's only 23 weeks since I first found this site, twenty weeks since I got Marnia's books. It seems like a much longer length of time and I only discovered it when I went to look at my profile page on here.

I’ve been preoccupied with how unproductive in implementing Karezza I’ve been lately…until recently, when I realized that the road to Karezza isn’t the same road that I’m on. The road to Karezza is paved with steps leading to incorporation as part of your life; essentialy, it’s finish what you start. However, as I sit here contemplating the rather large list of tasks I’ve given myself, I’m thinking that there might be another approach. That is to relax and not worry about finishing. Or, perhaps, restart constantly.

Stoicism vs. Dominance

The more I read the more stoical I become. And of course stoicism is what gave rise to the English gentleman of the 19th century to the present day. Gentlemanly behaviour does not just apply to the treatment of women but applies to how we might treat all of humanity. The "tamed" instincts of the gentleman are in agreement of nature. The instincts are always there but they have been transformed into something that does men good.

My take on all this is that if women were predominantly unattractive to men and vice versa the population would be declining not expanding. Mating to have children is part of the survival of the species - simple as that. In a world without pornography men would be more sensitive to the natural forms of women, it would be easier for men in natural circumstances to fall for women of no particular beauty and for women in similar circumstances to not have to feel like they have to compete with what men hooked on pornography may perceive as the "perfect image" of a willing women.

Okay, writing hypothetically, imagine that you have been with the same person for 15 to 20 years. What do you think it is that keeps people interested in each other sexually and simply as friends over such a long period of time? There are quite a few factors that come into play aren't there?

Physical attraction
Emotional Attraction
Belonging
Love
Shared Experiences
Children
A sense of duty to reciprocate the time and effort that your partner has invested in you over the years.
Warmth and Tenderness
Stability in your life together

As most of us know resisting a compulsion is difficult. When faced with a compulsion my current tactic is to say to myself a simple mantra - "it will pass" and to focus on saying this to myself a few times whilst changing my location / activity. I have found that this is quite successful.

I also try to conjure up that feeling of contentment I achieve when I have resisted compulsions successfully for a couple of weeks or so. Giving myself time to focus on my successes is very important. I suffer from depression and it also helps soothe the symptoms of this too.