Day 18. No PMO

I won't go into all the reasons why I'm doing this; but I will say that on most days I could masturbate 7 or 8 times and...I felt like crap after. It was out of boredom, pure and simple. I'd find myself looking for more and more extreme types of porn, just to kill the time.

This is my second attempt at going 90 days No PMO. I relapsed on day 17 on the first attempt, so I've already beaten my previous record. that's a good sign.
I had major cravings on days 8 and 9 and have been fine up until today. I've got cravings worse than ever; but I'll fight it.

In the last week I've had two wet dreams. Before giving up PMO, I had never had a wet dream. It was slightly of putting the first time. Waking up to find my underwear and bed cloths wet. I thought I'd become incontinent but I'm not that old (though sometimes feel like I am).

Do I feel any different from before taking on this challenge? Well, sort of:
I've noticed my voice is a bit clearer. I feel a bit more motivated and I'm better at concentrating on tasks. I'm now able to talk to strangers without the overbearing anxiety I had before; though I'm still a bit socially awkward. I'm not sure if these benefits are placebo or not. I sometimes wonder if I'm just punishing myself by attempting this challenge, and whether there are any real benefits. I will battle on regardless, in the hope that I'm not wasting my willpower (will power is limited you know?). Anyway. Now I'm rambling.