How does abstaining from pmo create sexual magnetism?

Submitted by Spiritualhealing1988 on
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Is it because saving our seed makes us more productive towards other activities? Is it because we become less socially nervous? Is it because we give off a pheromone that says we're ready to mate? I mean do you feel and know that your magnetic? What causes it and how does it feel lik to be magnetic? I have had what I think was the feeling, but would like to confirm. Can anyone give any insight into this.

I think it's just because you

I think it's just because you're more attuned to your environment and the people around you. A lot of guys mention that they notice women flirting with them a whole lot more. I think it has always been like this, guys were just blind to it. This includes myself :p

Don't overthink this though :)

Youmight be right to a

Youmight be right to a certain extent high achiever, but I also think that there is something else. It might be a sense of confidence and the look in your eyes and the lack of a creepy-I-wanna-bone-you vibe. There have been guys who said that women have approached them too. This hasn't happend to me consistently, but there have been times where a girl at a bar might talk to me out of nowhere, and trust me,when I was all pmoed out I would have noticed when a girl approached me cuz I would have been obsessing over sex. It seems to happen on and off for me at this point.

That's definetly true, I

That's definetly true, I agree with everything you wrote. All I can add is that it's pretty awesome, lol.

To be honest, when I was heavy on the porn, a girl who looked at me made me insanely anxious. Not good. I was my own cockblock, haha.

Also I must say, my confidence totally rocks now. I mean, I'm at ease around women, before this beautifull women used to intimidate me. Now, they don't.

I definetly think that there is a vibe that you give off.

.

needhops wrote:

Youmight be right to a certain extent high achiever, but I also think that there is something else. It might be a sense of confidence and the look in your eyes and the lack of a creepy-I-wanna-bone-you vibe. There have been guys who said that women have approached them too. This hasn't happend to me consistently, but there have been times where a girl at a bar might talk to me out of nowhere, and trust me,when I was all pmoed out I would have noticed when a girl approached me cuz I would have been obsessing over sex. It seems to happen on and off for me at this point.

I think its all about the individual person, I dont really believe all that much in how PMO gives you that creepy vibe. Im sure there are guys who PMO tons and still get ass whenever they want. I think stopping just brings out a hunger in you for real women and depending on your personality it may do what you say. PMO makes you give little effort in trying because you know that "harem" is waiting for you at home.

What you said is true that it

What you said is true that it's all about the individual. Everyone reacts differently to porn. Ybop visitors, unfortunately, are the people who react to it the worst. I never had morphing tastes...I just liked watching hot girls have sex. My social anxiety and interactions with girls,however could not have been worse. For me, pmo gave me, and the effects still are still there but weakening, the mindset that I must try and have sex with everygirl I saw. Even if she wasn't attractive and I had no intention of even getting the girls number, I had to get her to like me. Believe me, if you haven't experienced this, this KILLS your chances with girls. Even the 11 year old me knew that was the wrong way to go. It takes you out of your genuine self and makes you a fake,desperate creep.

This ,in hindsight after I realized wasn't normal, is how I feel about the old me. I know that I have a good personality and am reasonably good looking, so I know that this creepy vibe is what was/is killing me, and I'm sure that others rebooting can relate. I'm sure once this is shedded from our system, there will be girls who would like our respective look and vibe. I think this is where the heads start turning.

I wonder if abstaining brings out a hunger

I wonder if abstaining" brings out a hunger for women" in men, would it be the same for women bringing out a hunger for men. From my own experience I would say yes absolutely it does. Are there any women here that could please share their experience about this factor. My problem is that in order to abstain from PMO keeping my mind clear of all/any triggers seems to be a key factor, this seemed easy when I was also abstaining from real men. Now that I have relationships with real men again it seems to take my mind back towards PMO...like a catch 22. Perhaps because the sexual relations that I have reintroduced back into my life are not Karezza based enough. After such a long time without a man and reading all these wonderful things about the healing powers of the penis etc I actually felt calm and satisfied after the first few times or so but it has steadily been growing into that hungry/never enough/chaser effect even when abstaining from orgasm. How can I have men back into my life (unless they are karezza skilled) without falling into this trap? Karezza is what I have longed for and ached for over a six year period to the point that I would rather be without a man if it was not karezza based sex. Let's be honest and not forget that the majority of people out there don't know about karezza (let alone have any karezza skills) sure I intended on leading the way but even that is not so easy. I don't want to give up hope of one day finding a partner to share in karezza, but it seems that if I want to be with someone in the meantime I must take it as it is hot and steamy.

I think that ultimately

you have to be willing to walk away if you introduce a lover to the ideas and he just isn't open to exploring. Sad It's a tough decision to make, and I'm sure no one judges you for not making it.

I can agree on all that.

I feel much more confident around women and can hold better conversations and call them out on stupid things they do playfully. Etc. I haven't tried sex yet but I have this mental block in my head that tells me if I tried to have sex it wouldn't work so the thought of sex scares me.

Yea the 117 guy is

Yea the 117 guy is unfortunate, I hope he doesn't give up. I'm at day 86, and I'm not exactly at the point where you guys are. I've had times where I just seem to enjoy being around women and that is great, but I also still am a little sex-obsessed which tightens me up in a bad way. I feel I'm a bad case because I started young and got myself in deep. Some people keep seeing improvements well over 100 days so I think that's me and maybe mr.117. I'm a little jealous at your progress:) what days r u guys on?

I'm on day 36

But I am in a bad situation also man. I started watching foot fetish porn at age 12 and it escalated to all this crazy porn. I never even wired to a real female( except when I jumped my moms foot and came at 12 which isn't really wiring to normal sexual intercourse. I had some relationships and couldn't get it up. I mean sexually I am not even close, but my general moods are just getting better. I'm still living with the fear that I may never be aroused by simply having sex with a girl. The one thing that gives me hope is that when I flirt with my cuddle buddy in person and we touch each other make out, I get hard and sometimes precum. Have you tried anything like that? Keep trying and your brain will slowly catch on. I am actually waiting for another month or so because when I get hard off even just sensations... My brain wants to go towards the fetish thoughts. So I think I am rewiring fast but I have not even rebooted yet. You won't really k ow where you are unless you go out and flirt with real women. Have you been doing that? Trying to see if your cured with fantasies can not really prove anything IMO.

I'm also a virgin and have never wired to women

So I am expecting it to be lOnger. Now did you start with porn? If so how intense? Have you wired to real women? And last question what day are you on and where would you say you are in the process. Just trying to see your situation and how far along you are compared to me.

You can check my progress

You can check my progress here:

http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=315.msg3545#new

Same nickname.

I did have wiring to real women, kissing touching, slight sexual contact. I also never had full blown ed, I just experienced apathy. To be honest, I think you can rewire very quickly (after reboot time). I mean it's to be expected that your brain will respond better to those stimuli.

I also didn't start out with harcore porn. It started with Britney Spears in a newspaper, bikini girls and afterwards porn. But I was a heavy masturbator, sometimes up to 5 times a day.

Good luck!

I think the sexual magnetism

I think the sexual magnetism is something in your aura (energy body). People can pick up your aura with their subconscious mind and 6th sense. It can be a mental transmission(telepathic) as well. Or what they call Law of Attraction.

The last time when i successfully abstain from ejaculation for about 3 weeks or 1 month, I get a hot woman who had lost contact with me for some time, suddenly call my on the phone out of the blue, wanting to date me. Another time, I was browsing some ads of people looking for jobs, and I saw this sweet korean girl looking for a job. I just emailed her asking if she's like to be friends. I have tried this numerous times, very rarely they say yes. But this time this girl said yes, and we ended up having sex on our 3rd date.

This article

summarizes much of what Gary and I think. However, its focus is on porn/masturbation.

Porn, Masturbation and Mojo: A Neuroscience Perspective | Your Brain On Porn

There's not a one-size-fits-all answer, as people have different brains and have used them differently. All the factors you mentioned may (sometimes) be at play.

You may also find this article interesting: Men: Does Frequent Ejaculation Cause A Hangover? | Your Brain On Porn

Perhaps our natural state is magnetic, and it only evaporates when we chronically overstimulate ourselves...or isolate ourselves.