Is Prolactin Ruining Your Love Life?
We've observed that there's a lingering "hangover" after passionate sex, and it's our suspicion that high levels of a hormone called prolactin may be a major culprit. According to Psychology Today:
Studies at two German universities found that the hormone prolactin may dampen sexual arousal after orgasm, perhaps signaling to the body that it's had enough. Researchers, led by Michael Exton, Ph.D., a biological psychologist at the University of Essen's Institute of Medical Psychology, asked 10 women to masturbate until achieving orgasm, then examined them afterward. He discovered a surge in the hormones adrenaline, noradrenaline and prolactin that occurred during arousal and orgasm - but prolactin's rise was the most dramatic and prolonged.
Prolactin has been linked to functions in both men and women, including sperm and breast milk production. Exton believes it regulates dopamine, a neurotransmitter that plays a role in movement control, pleasure and pain, and likens it to a built-in switch for turning on and off sexual desire. "The prolactin surge may possibly signal the brain and reproductive organs that `once is enough,'" he says.
Women are not alone in releasing prolactin after orgasm - Exton's previous research on men and animals has uncovered a similar dynamic.
As prolactin tends to be inversely tied to levels of dopamine, let's begin with dopamine, the "craving" neurochemical. All addictive substances also increase dopamine. In fact, that's why they're addictive. The lead up to orgasm is the biggest (legal) blast of dopamine available to mankind. This powerful motivator is the reason that humans have engaged in sex with such fervor for millennia...
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Have A Laugh at the Gender Gap
REAL MAN TEST
Note: All "real men" answer "C" to all of these questions. Knowing this, women will have come far in understanding men and enriching their own lives if they carefully review the "C" answers.
1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing all disease, providing an infinite supply of clean energy, wiping out hunger and poverty, and permanently eliminating oppression and violence all over the entire Earth.
You decide to: A. Present it to the President of the United States. B. Present it to the Secretary General of the United Nations. C. Take it apart.
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Letters from the Trenches
Thanks so much for the book, Marnia! There are so many people in our age group who are embittered because of past relationships, and it often carries over into the next. I spent a few years living in ashrams in my early twenties (SYDA/ Swami Muktananda), and I remember hearing lots of strict stuff about sex. So much was confusing to me, because 'sex' seemed so natural and loving to me, but now it all makes much more sense, with the dopamine/oxytocin info.
We're all tired of the roller coaster ride! I think people crave concrete, empirical explanations to support new information and ideas, and now we have it! I'm aware of current trends among Tantra fans to switch partners, and even attempt polyamorous 'families.' I've sought to understand my ex-husband's ongoing insatiable need for a variety of partners, and my education has shown me a lot I'd never be interested in. I was really getting discouraged after four years of meeting 'maybes', and then especially after the last man I met this past October who had every sign of being a true soulmate, until we 'blew it'. Talk about a textbook demise....I wish you every success and blessing. J [Canada]
PEACE BETWEEN THE SHEETS News
Declining the High of Orgasm by Andrew Scot Bolsinger
Marnia Robinson is used to the raised eyebrows, the skeptical sneer and even the direct criticism of her ideas. But she has also seen the quiet relief on the face of someone who seems to understand just what it is she is writing about.
Robinson's life took her across the globe until she recently settled in Ashland, right about the same time her book was being prepared for release. In many ways, the years of experience and study have culminated in bringing her to Ashland, and to a new, possibly very different, chapter of her life.
About the book
The book is entitled "Peace Between the Sheets," and touts a new, or more accurately, a very ancient, form of lovemaking that takes the emphasis off fulfillment or climax and places it on to the interaction and closeness of the partners. The book is about coming together as people at a higher level than our biological urges. Simply put, Robinson says orgasms should be avoided. "Your biology is pushing you around," Robinson says.
At the thought of it, the eyebrows raise. The skepticism washes across the face like an incoming wave. But Robinson, backed with spiritual texts and scientific data, is undeterred.
"I got tired of hitting my head against the brick wall," Robinson said of her early relationships. Once consummated, the relationship would change, the romantic luster would fade, replaced with anger and distance. You become "addicted to your lover," she says. "When they don't dish out what it is you think you need, you have a lot of problems."
Time in Europe
In those days, Robinson was a high-powered corporate lawyer for a major American business. She was promoted, and moved to the company's office in Europe. But in 1991, when the time came to be relocated back to the states, Robinson decided to give up her career and remain in Europe. She was just beginning to discover the tenets of her book.
She began her own 10-year apprenticeship in the school of relationships and love, determined to "understand what makes us tick," she says. "It really was like getting a Ph.D. in a subject we don't think about in those terms."
The first validation came through the ancient writing of Lao Tse in a book called "Hua Hu Ching." The book talks of sacred sexuality. Lao Tse discovered, Robinson said, that intercourse without climax "improves health, reduces cravings and heals emotions," Robinson says.
The next validation came next. Robinson met and fell in love with man who shared her views. As the relationship progressed, they grew closer together, more comfortable, and more at peace - the direct opposite of Robinson's previous relationships. After they married, Robinson's husband - who is a scientist by training - began to uncover the physical and biological negatives associated with orgasms. Dopamine levels soar and crash, creating a trend very similar to addiction.
So this form of lovemaking helps keep the dopamine in check. Dopamine is a neurochemical that stimulates eating and sex, "two basic things to keep humanity going, breeding and passing along genes." Robinson says.
But too much dopamine is the problem. "We have hijacked this pleasure center," she says, leading to many addictive behaviors. Backed with scientific support and ancient spiritual truths, Robinson finished the book, which explains the basis for the idea in the first half and a program for lovemaking in the second. "This is the instructional manual," Robinson says.
What's next?
Robinson's first local talk and book signing is at Bloomsbury Books on Feb. 12. She looks forward to the dialogue, knowing that some eyebrows will raise and some skeptics will challenge her. But again, that's OK with her. She is less concerned with converting people who disagree as she is in extending a help to those troubled with a love life that is not working.
"My goal is not to be some guru who talks about this," Robinson said. Instead she hopes the book becomes a manual of sexual healing that partners can discover on their own.
Original article in Ashland Daily Tidings