"Sacred Sex Quest"
Ever hear of something and have a deep knowing that it was just plain right? That was my reaction to the concept of sacred sexuality. It made perfect sense that two things I cherished — the desire for closer union with the Divine and intimacy with a mate — could be combined.
True, the concept of using sex differently - by avoiding climax - was certainly novel, but I regarded it as an intriguing experiment, which I then judged on its own merits. I found it protected my spiritual clarity and was also beneficial to my relationship, and, with much trial and error, I incorporated it into my unions.
This shift was easier because I didn't grow up hearing that sex was sinful. As a consequence, I felt no need to purify it or normalize it. Sex was enjoyable and natural before I learned of controlled intercourse, and enjoyable and natural after I made the change.
As I learned more, it seemed obvious that the neurochemistry of sex, with its roller coaster ride of hormones and neurotransmitters, was behind the various religious doctrines that condemned sex as sinful. After all, the hidden addictive cycle of sex does cause many people to take rash actions and manipulate others, or even use appalling force, while seeking relief for sexual frustration. ....
Others grew up heavily influenced by the unfortunate belief that sex itself is sinful. Worse yet, when they rejected the "sex is sinful" doctrine, they sometimes rocketed to the other end of the spectrum. Such people often counter their upbringing by focusing a lot of energy on sexual gratification — with or without the gloss of Tantric, or other, sacred sex terminology.
In the process, the preciousness of relationships is often overlooked, or even discounted as merely another misguided religious myth. The focus can easily narrow to the search for the perfect orgasm....
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