Day 3: Cerebral masturbation

Submitted by ArcticFox on Mon, 2009-01-05 05:16
Community topics: 
withdrawal symptoms
masturbation addiction

If my hands don't do the masturbating, my brains will. I was lying down in bed at night, unable to sleep and concentrated on keeping my hands in control. The previously irritating tension and contractions in my penis started to feel more pleasant. A little like masturbation but weaker. I began having erotic thoughts and got an erection. Sometimes I experienced something that resembled an orgasm but was weaker, too and didn't result in ejaculation. And it didn't result in the relaxed feeling that real orgasms give. I don't know if I liked it or not. Sometimes it was pleasant, sometimes like torture. It went on for four hours. Then I got out of bed and went for a long walk.

I recalled using a similar technique at the age of 15; Erotic fantasies without masturbation causing an erection that lasted for hours and a weak sensation of pleasure. Now I'd like no know if this is just as addictive as orgasmic masturbation or if this could be considered "karezza masturbation" and thus harmless or even useful.

Comments

Marnia's picture

Submitted by Marnia on Mon, 2009-01-05 12:36.

to this question. If it increases your frustration, chances are it's raising your dopamine - past the point of balance. Some of this cannot be escaped during recovery, because the primitive part of your brain thinks it's helping you to focus on a familiar path to "comfort".

Your question reminds me of the experience of someone else who experimented with avoiding orgasm. I put asterisks around the phrase I was thinking of. Try experimenting with turning your attention elsewhere...for example, to things that raise your oxytocin (http://www.reuniting.info/node/1461#comment-390smiley, or distract your attention (http://www.reuniting.info/node/1826). If you can't get out of bed and do these things, visualize them vividly.

As of tomorrow, it will have been a full month since my last orgasm. I suppose this is long enough to call my experiment finished, although I find little desire to resume my former habits at this point.

I think the results of this type of experiment could largely depend on how one approaches it. I have tried to view it as an opportunity to explore the whole idea of channeling sexual energy, and as such it has been rather interesting. I noticed very little difficulty after the second week. In fact, my level of sexual frustration now seems a bit below average for me, if anything.

I think I could have run into trouble if I had just attempted to “put a cap on” my sexuality. Instead, I allowed myself to experience pleasure and arousal without trying to go anywhere with it. I did a good deal of dancing, singing, laughing, jogging, etc., and I think these all helped. The only thing *I tried very hard to avoid is any state of mind that felt like it came from craving-mode.* I did engage in a little self-pleasuring, which, it turned out, was as satisfying as trying to get myself off.

I think that the main thing I learned from this experiment is about “energy” in general. We think of having energy as a good thing, but on closer observation, our first reaction to having a lot of concentrated energy (sexually, physically, emotionally, etc.) is often to try to get rid of it as quickly as possible (“catharsis”). This is similar to a principle of physics, actually. High potential energy states are considered “unstable” because there is a tendency to return very suddenly to a low-energy state, resulting in a large release of heat. The energy is more useful if it can be converted in a more controlled manner.

I think that if I want to use my energy to best effect, it entails learning to flow with high-energy states instead of trying to escape them. I can learn to walk the tightrope, or I can keep falling off.