not much to say really
just am cross at everyonei know. impatient. not feel understood. not knowing where i belong. really. am just terrified and frozen from this. i really feel lost.
Permalink Submitted by Rockhardington on Tue, 2010-01-12 15:28.
Ive been there a few times in last couple of years. Hang in there, as you start sorting out these intimacy issues, you will be able to connect to people effortlessly. It takes some time though. Just keep doing good things for yourself in the meantime and things will sort themselves out. Dont worry about the fumbling, it can take a little while to get a handle on these things. Youre doing the right thing by confronting your issues with addiction. At least youre able to see what the problem is. Some dont even get a chance to do that.
Permalink Submitted by kurisu on Tue, 2010-01-12 17:23.
to the battlefield, my friend. It is not fun or easy to fight this. The fact that you feel so alone, unloved, means that you are seeing some success! It means that you have succeeded in not giving in to the temptations! It sounds so counter-intuitive that you should feel such pain at success, but that is the nature of this beast. When we are recovering from this addiction, feelings are not our friends. They are unreliable, and nearly meaningless (save for the pain they cause us). Do you have any close friends or any kind of support at all? Being with other good people can help you during times like this. Good luck!
Permalink Submitted by Sardonyx on Thu, 2010-01-14 04:24.
i didnt see daffy's post. marnia, I thought the companion is a way to advise the person on relationships, in terms of how the opposite sex sees things, which is more relevant for straight seuality.
If i'm mistaken, is there any reason you suggested a "goddess"?
Permalink Submitted by Marnia on Thu, 2010-01-14 09:31.
is mostly just for support, whatever form that takes...and believe me, it takes *lots* of different forms from what Companions tell me.
This site explores the synergy of male and female mutual generosity/support. That's just "what we do here." However, I can't imagine that anyone would be bothered if you put out a request for a male Courtly Companion, if you feel that's what you need.
My point was simply that your sexual orientation isn't necessarily all that relevant in a cyber pal Companion.
Permalink Submitted by Sapphire on Wed, 2010-01-13 15:34.
I know how you feel cause I spent the last 10 years of my 16 year marriage feeling just like that. I can't help but wonder if something happened to cause you to feel that way, and if something did, would it help to talk about it? But for what its worth, I know just how you feel (or at least I think I know). Long story short, feeling isolated just sucks.
Permalink Submitted by Sardonyx on Wed, 2010-01-13 16:09.
i had issues with my current "spiritual confident" person. its still processing. i just have to place my trust *somewhere*. but my spiritual confident offered my only warnings really. i want to break out. i think curiosity can be an antidote to this fear. in my native language , my real name can mean: joy. and maybe it is my path., you know, making se from joy, all manners of things should be done from joy.
Sorry
Ive been there a few times in last couple of years. Hang in there, as you start sorting out these intimacy issues, you will be able to connect to people effortlessly. It takes some time though. Just keep doing good things for yourself in the meantime and things will sort themselves out. Dont worry about the fumbling, it can take a little while to get a handle on these things. Youre doing the right thing by confronting your issues with addiction. At least youre able to see what the problem is. Some dont even get a chance to do that.
*big hug*
What can we do to help?
Welcome
to the battlefield, my friend. It is not fun or easy to fight this. The fact that you feel so alone, unloved, means that you are seeing some success! It means that you have succeeded in not giving in to the temptations! It sounds so counter-intuitive that you should feel such pain at success, but that is the nature of this beast. When we are recovering from this addiction, feelings are not our friends. They are unreliable, and nearly meaningless (save for the pain they cause us). Do you have any close friends or any kind of support at all? Being with other good people can help you during times like this. Good luck!
Kurisu
Would you like a
Courtly Companion? If so, maybe some kindly goddess would like to volunteer. It can be helpful.
marnia
i already written i am not straight. so why this offer?
.
.
Daffy,
Any chance you could put your post back? It was so supportive and insightful that I purposely didn't post. I couldn't write anything as good.
Sar, dear, as Daffy said, It's not clear why sexual orientation would be relevant to having a Courtly Companion. They're only pals.
Feeling any better?
*big hug*
i didnt
i didnt see daffy's post. marnia, I thought the companion is a way to advise the person on relationships, in terms of how the opposite sex sees things, which is more relevant for straight seuality.
If i'm mistaken, is there any reason you suggested a "goddess"?
A Courtly Companion
is mostly just for support, whatever form that takes...and believe me, it takes *lots* of different forms from what Companions tell me.
This site explores the synergy of male and female mutual generosity/support. That's just "what we do here." However, I can't imagine that anyone would be bothered if you put out a request for a male Courtly Companion, if you feel that's what you need.
My point was simply that your sexual orientation isn't necessarily all that relevant in a cyber pal Companion.
I know how you feel
I know how you feel cause I spent the last 10 years of my 16 year marriage feeling just like that. I can't help but wonder if something happened to cause you to feel that way, and if something did, would it help to talk about it? But for what its worth, I know just how you feel (or at least I think I know). Long story short, feeling isolated just sucks.
thanks
i had issues with my current "spiritual confident" person. its still processing. i just have to place my trust *somewhere*. but my spiritual confident offered my only warnings really. i want to break out. i think curiosity can be an antidote to this fear. in my native language , my real name can mean: joy. and maybe it is my path., you know, making se from joy, all manners of things should be done from joy.