Day 7

Submitted by Sirens on
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i've been sleeping at odd times; usually up till 2:00 or 3:00 am listening to music or chatting online.

last night i felt depressed while lying in bed. I felt lonely like lacking connection with people and felling how weird it would be for someone to go for years without connecting with people. how our life is our own individual journey that we travel by ourselves and always leads to death. how love seems like an illusion leading to pain or regret. but part of me longs to connect with people. i was remembering past emotions, pain and feelings that i haven't fully dealt with yet; they just kept playing over in my mind... soon after I went to sleep one of my family members heard banging. it was actually me banging against the wall with my feet while sleeping and talking in a dazed voice. so now I'm active in my sleep talking and moving. ( I don't remember doing this ) i though the body paralyzes the muscles once it drifts off? any thoughts/ explanations/ maybe a withdrawal symptom? I'd like to avoid waking up people at 3am if possible :D

Comments

Illusion

Quote:

love seems like an illusion leading to pain or regret

Read Mary Baker Eddy...she founded an American religion (Christian Science) based on the premise that Love is the only true reality....all this pain and dis-ease is the illusion....second thought, don't read Science & Health it's not well written.
For me, pain comes from all the mind fucking I do to myself....memories, desires, fantasies.... Perhaps my life is charmed (it is) as very little truly bad stuff happens to me. My house did not fall down in an earthquake. I ate last night. Nobody slugged me for looking at sexy women (I didn't tell my wife about the iTunes but she has seen some of the tagging). I have not been shot or cut by a knife. My pains are mostly self inflicted. My wife grimaces at the third kiss and I am hurt. She did not hurt me. She, clearly without blame or rancor, expressed that she had had more than enough. She was irritated. My mind made up the "she doesn't love me", I'm an ass", "I deserve better", and whatever other nameless crap I could make up to hurt myself.....(excuse me while I puke).
It's not unusual at all for the body to be active while asleep. Sleep is a wonderful time for processing unconscious stuff. Tell your dreams that you value them by writing them down, share them with somebody, or create art to memorialize them. With such recognition they will bless you in many ways. Check out Carl Jung and Joseph Campbell.
7 days is awesome
Stay with us my friend