No more day counting

Submitted by Patientfaith07 on Wed, 2010-08-11 07:51
Community topics: 
pornography
recovery
masturbation
relapse
will to carry on
resolve
getting back up

Day Zero.

I succumbed to the addiction last night. More of a binge, 3 times in 12 hours while watching porn...

but i realized i probably set myself up for failure from the get go. the day counting need to stop. i suggest that to everyone. its not a goal to be reached, its about overcoming, enduring. One day at a time.

Need to not dwell on it as much...

im moving my computer out of the bedroom. heavily limiting my time on it now...

anytime i feel anything, run away, distraction...hobby

once the huge cloud of shame and guilt left, i just got downright mad. no more mister nice guy. its on.

'You get up, dust yourself off, and get back in the game' don't stay facedown in the mud, its not fun there

Comments

Submitted by Sirens on Wed, 2010-08-11 13:00.

oops !! i noticed that after binging you really need to push yourself to get back into abstaining because orgasm makes you hornier. the first three days after a conscious are difficult. keep going strong.

do anything you can to distract your self immediately... go cook, take a drive, listen to music, play online checkers, exercise, favorite movies!whatever
this is what i've been doing you must have something to go to automatically when your tempted.

think before you act. and consider what you learned by failing.

why dont you install k9 on your computer ? anything that makes it more difficult to access will help. and im going to stop counting days too

Submitted by Consciousness on Wed, 2010-08-11 12:31.

As David Hawkins says, "You disappear that which you choose and perpetuate that which you resist."

I've found that the journey is really about letting go (and letting God/Love/The Source). We don't need to be in control of how things should be. This is very hard for the ego to understand because it likes feeling that there's winning/losing (I won't go into details of the tricks the ego plays here, but David Hawkins and Wayne Dyer has written dozens of enlightening books on these topics). The truth is that we are already complete. Every experience is a blessing. Whatever we feed our attention or energy on grows stronger. I vaguely remember enjoying entertainment (of all kinds, TV/blockbuster movies/video games) to some extent, years ago. Looking back, it is evident that it is a form of escape from what is around us. I suspect many have the same love/hate relationship with their stimulating images. One really doesn't need any form of entertainment when they are living a life of purpose and service. That is exciting enough in and of itself. As we learn to appreciate our unique expressions of our life in all facets, it is easy to develop finer emotions (that people tend to dissipate in the procreative act) towards greater creative expressions. There are endless avenues for your unique inspirations and gifts to the world. When you shift your focus on what you want instead of what you don't, and be what you want, then you will allow this extremely potent power (sexual desire) to elevate you in your journey.

In spirit,