Whether you're trying to overcome an addiction, find a partner, make friends, or just improve your social skills, one of the best things you can do is find local groups of friendly people to hang out with. Below are some online resources suggested by members to help you find a group that you will enjoy. If you have other suggestions for additions, especially for areas outside the USA, please leave them in comments below.

This FAQ addresses questions about how to use the site. If you have questions about concepts on this site, you will likely find answers in the appropriate section of the forum, by searching the site, or in this list of topics.  If these routes don't answer your questions, we invite you to post them here.

Many articles on this site talk about the effects of neurochemical fluctuations caused by withdrawal or orgasmic "hangovers" on mood and relationships. The easiest way to understand these effects is to experience them for yourself. However, due to being "inside" the experience of your own moods, it can be difficult to see your own fluctuations in an objective way. When you are "down," it seems like things have always been that way, and likewise when you are feeling better. Similarly, while experiencing cravings for porn or more orgasms, it can seem like the cravings will never go away.

These materials relate, directly or indirectly, to sexual addiction and recovery. In addition to the items below, see:

• Having flashbacks to porn images? Here is a soothing video of women's faces and a second one based on movie stars.

If you are blessed enough to have a partner, you have a way to make your withdrawal and recovery far less uncomfortable. By carefully approaching your partner with less passion and more nurturing affection, you can produce more of the hormone (oxytocin) that eases cravings and makes any type of withdrawal easier.

However, the risk is great that you will fall back into conventional sex as soon as your sense of well-being returns. Your primitive brain will then soon persuade you that you need variety in your love life, and you'll be right back where you are now, more discouraged than ever. Read about the Coolidge Effect, to strengthen your resolve. Remember, your goal is not sexual sobriety as the world defines it. It's lasting well-being, harmony, and, perhaps even greater spiritual awareness.

One of the biggest impediments to recovery is the belief that others are having great sex lives, and that you would be missing out if you didn't look after yourself sexually. In fact, you may not be missing much if you're comparing your situation with most relationships based on conventional sex.

Here is Leo Tolstoy's account of his honeymoon:

Whether you stay or leave, have compassion for your sweetheart. A raging addiction is agonizing; your subconscious brain screams that only ONE thing will relieve your misery (whether it's a beer, an orgasm, or ?) - and you must have it now, regardless of how destructive it is.

The Manual has five parts:

By being a member of this forum, you have the possibility to contact other members privately.

Currently, there are two ways to do that (but this may change).

Private Messages

You must be registered and logged in to send private messages.

You can send a private message to other members this way:
1) go to the user's profile page (click on its name, in the forum).
2) click on the link "send private message".
3) compose then send the private message.

Note: members have the choice to turn off private messages. (see you own profile, and click on the 'edit' tab. See section 'Private message settings'.