Submitted by Marnia on Sat, 2008-12-06 15:09
Just to clarify, this site is not about repressing sexuality (that is, trying to avoid orgasm out of fear, because it's "sinful" or dangerous). Nor is it about swearing off masturbation forever. Men who choose to overcome porn addiction have taught *us* that stopping *both* masturbation and orgasm for an extended period makes it easier to quit. This makes sense because anything your brain associates with its addictive, super-stimulating "reward" (porn/masturbation) can trigger intense frustration.
Submitted by Marnia on Sat, 2008-11-08 12:17
Advice for mates: If your partner is hooked on porn, understand that at a neurochemical level, addictions are surprisingly similar. The issue isn’t dirty pictures; it’s a physical compulsion. Blame and threats will achieve little in comparison with your conviction that your partner can get informed about his true circumstances and seek support. (At that point it is up to him.)
Submitted by Marnia on Sat, 2008-11-08 12:05
Here are some thoughts from several men who have overcome porn use:
The first step (I know this is cliche) is recognizing you have a problem- knowing that your chronic masturbation to porn has adversely affected your life and relationships.
It took me multiple attempts (and I learned from each attempt) but I have now been masturbation and porn free for six months.
Submitted by Love_Lust on Thu, 2012-02-02 20:22
Soooo i went 3 weeks straight No PMO then..
Submitted by beherenow on Tue, 2012-01-31 14:30
yesterday, I called K (the Finnish girl) after I submitted the blog. We had a nice talk, but she was not available to meet during the week, but she suggested maybe we can meet in the weekend because her sister is coming to visit her and would be nice to introduce some friends to her. I felt it immediately, that sinking feeling in the stomach, the one I felt all the times I lost a girl (when I know that a girl I liked has become my friend instead of my lover). So maybe I will see my new "friend" and her sister in the weekend.
Submitted by beherenow on Mon, 2012-01-30 12:44
Monday, Jan 30th.
Woke up at 6:00 as I had a body pump class booked at the gym. I slept really well, but it was not enough. I was a bit grumpy during the class and didn't even notice any of the girls at the class. I tried to do some 10 minutes of mindfulness meditation on the metro to the office, but my mind was very noisy.
Submitted by beherenow on Mon, 2012-01-30 12:30
I woke up around 4:45 because Amandine had an early flight and she was not so quiet while packing. She came to hug me good bye, and as I turned my face our lips met. It was a very brief kiss, more like a kiss a mom gives to her son when saying goodbye rather than a lover's kiss. Anyway, she left. I then drifted in and out of sleep a lot. Had a lot of brief dreams. There was one that was a bit sexual, where I was making love to the Finnish girl, K (btw, she didn't show up to the expats party on Friday at she promised).
Submitted by beherenow on Mon, 2012-01-30 11:36
I woke up again a bit too early, even though I slept around 2:30. And the fact that Amandine was snoring like hell didn't help. I listened the music on my phone till she woke up. There was a text message from Josephine, the girl I met the night before and she has written "was great meeting you, you seem like a lot of fun! Sorry it was a bit of friends night out...Let me know when you want to do salsa!". That made me start the day with a smile despite the bad sleep. We went to the 7/11 a block away to buy some croissant and cinnamon buns. We went back, eat breakfast and headed to town.
Submitted by beherenow on Mon, 2012-01-30 10:24
Friday, Jan 27
I didn't sleep that well. I think I woke up around 6:45 and was not able to sleep back (my plan was to wake up at 8:00), after some time I gave up and went to the office earlier than usual and arrived there around 8:30 (usually I am there between 9 and 9:30). My plan was to finish early and do some running before meeting my couch surfer and heading for the expats party. However, the day turned out differently. Some urgent tasks came up, and I was not able to leave the office before 17:30.
Submitted by beherenow on Thu, 2012-01-26 16:04
I woke up a bit earlier than I expected (my alarm was set at 8:30), I think it was 7:45...so I started the day with listening and following the whole tracks of Shanti Gwain's visualization audio book. It took an hour and I felt really good after it.
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