Submitted by Marnia on Sat, 2008-11-08 09:36
Every bit of emotional clearing you do will make it easier to open up to deep intimacy with a partner. Don’t hesitate to find a support group and/or therapist to help with this process.
Submitted by Arnold on Fri, 2011-11-18 21:46
Ok. This is my first stab at blogging. I've started at day 1572 (today) because that's about how long (4 years and 16 weeks) I've been exploring Marnia's ideas and inviting others to explore it with me. Finding a partner to do even 3 weeks of the non-sexual Exchanges is something that I have not yet been able to create. (This part of the Exchanges is important to me due to its potential effect on healing the effects of early childhood bonding trauma.) I'm looking forward to connecting with other members of this on-line community.
Submitted by Sapphire on Tue, 2010-01-26 09:56
Now where was I? Oh, yes...
Submitted by Sapphire on Wed, 2010-01-20 23:06
OK, I have to get this off my chest because of something that just happened. I'll let what happened just a few minutes ago go, except to say that someone completely inadvertantly and innocently triggered me into a huge reaction that hopefully telling about this will help to stop in the future (my reaction that is). Anything that reminds me of what I am about to tell you triggers intense self-protective reactions in me that I cannot control. I have never told what follows to another living soul.
PORN TRIGGER ALERT:
Submitted by Sapphire on Mon, 2010-01-18 01:00
I was in college for nursing, and one of the required courses was Child Psychology, and the professor who taught the course must have seen something in me, because I was in the habit of studying in the cafeteria between classes, and he one day he came to my table and asked if he could sit down. I was afraid that he wanted to get into my pants, but I said yes anyway because I was curious about what he wanted, so he sat down, and over the course of that semester there developed one of the most important relationships of my life.
Submitted by Sapphire on Sat, 2010-01-16 23:05
So somebody asked me once: "what is you first memory?" My first memory is wanting to be dead when I was three years old. I remember it was my third birthday party, and someone stood me on a chair and they sang "Happy Bithday" to me and I stood there and started to cry and wished I was dead.
Submitted by Sapphire on Sat, 2010-01-16 21:53
OK, I'm going to try and tell what happened to me, to the best of my knowlege. So far I have written about parts of it, but here I am going to start at the beginning. To tell everything that happened may take several days and several posts.
Submitted by Sapphire on Tue, 2010-01-05 16:16
I was sexually abused as a child, and so I have a hyper-reactive limbic system. "Reuniting" and Karezza holds great hope for me to actually reprogram my brain and to actually heal myself at a level that psychotherapy has never been able to touch. Simply by cuddling and snuggling with my husband with non-sexualized affection (which is something so foreign yet so longed-for by me), I can already tell that this is something that I have been longing for all my life. The insights yielded by psychotherapy have been very important, but they haven't been enough...and now I think I know why.
Submitted by Giraffe on Tue, 2009-10-06 21:55
Funny how things from your very ancient past can still be unconsciously driving your life or behavior after many decades. I learned a few years ago that not having affection and even just a little attention from a main male in my life caused my cravings for sweets to increase. Comfort foods as they say. Melting chocolate. Crunchy cookies, smooth cake. However, this last time of losing a very dear male in my life to death; I just shut down and closed off even when trying to have another relationship two years after his death.
