addiction recovery

Hanging in there. Trying to recognize and deal with the brain worms as they come up. I miss the clarity I had a few weeks ago because the past few days have been foggy. It hasnt been terrible, but I see a striking difference. Things arent out of control and my life and mind are not not going in a downward spiral, but I dont really feel fluid or vibrant either, which is something I was starting to get used to.

This girl and I have been at it like rabbits for the past few days. We're like a couple of 18 year olds, but I can think of worse times in my life. I enjoy the closeness more than any of the orgasms though and I think she likes the closeness as well. Its definitely relieved some tensions and the bonding is there, so I am happy with that for now. She is also good about keeping space when needed. We are both students and working so having that sense of space is important. However, we are also going out later too to do something fun.

I had a slip because I was fantasizing too much and needed to relieve the pressure. On a good note, I met an attractive woman who seems pretty sane. Weve been on a couple of dates and we like spending time together. Im okay with not trying to get right into her pants as fast as I can. Im enjoying spending time with her doing simple things like talking and being outside. We just seem to like each others company. She responds very well to me taking the lead and seems to feel comfortable in that role. It seems very easy and natural, I dont have to overthink things.

Things are going well. Nothing crazy is going on. I am employed and am in school and i have a place to live, so i am feeling a kind of bliss that I havent had in a while. I live in a part of town with lots of healthy people around my age and I am feeling good. Finally, after a year of trying to abstain and work through pure hell at times, there is some fruit. My relationship to men and women are better, Im a little more social, active, and healthier than I was before. Overall, I can tell the difference between a year. I think Im growing some receptors back.

I had a slip, but not on my serious bottom line. I was feeling a little worn down from some feelings that I was dealing with concerning my mother. Some old unconscious stuff lingering around and I hadnt been really nourishing many social bonds. I just hit an end finally and looked at some light porn. But I did it for a good amount of time because I couldnt really get it on my secured computer. Escalating softcore? I didnt feel horrible, but once that happens you can really open the door for appetite again.

Hi!

I'm a 22 year old male recovering from porn addiction, my porn addiction is and has been the most influential and the most destructive force in my life. I came onto this site about 5 weeks ago when I was breaking down mentally. I felt I was loosing my grip on reality and the things that I was finding on the web startled me, enough so that I felt I needed help.

Day 36?

Been busy and its been a good strategy. Waking up early, not being lazy, spending time with the family, eating well, petting cats and dogs, talking to male friend, working, figuring out and directing my larger career goals, working out. Its been a good formula.