Well, this is really odd for me. I can't stay asleep. Now, I thought it was that my work was causing me to wake up and just ruminate on things left undone and tasks which seem insurmountable. But, it has been a perfect storm of sorts. My first girlfriend of ten years ago, who I proposed to has emailed me out of the blue and let on to some degree that the guy that I though would maybe be for her has gotten married. Fine, no big deal. Kindov. I have not talked to her in ages.

Would anyone like a pal that is also struggling in breaking the porn addiction?

Down for keeping tabs on eachother and just talking about it.
Let me know!

Hey guys, today is not the official start of the 60 day challenge since I said to myself that I wanted to start it when I wake up. Just going to write about some strategies I am consider doing to implement throughout the challenge, and hopefully they will carry over after the challange. I believe it is important to have at least some plan for tackling this. Many of us have come to the point where we find ourselves with a sex addiciton which we have struggled and failed countless times to overcome.

Before I loose interest in telling my story, I thought I would pen it down. For I am not sure how long I would be interested in verbalizing my state.

Today or tomorrow will be 60 days since I last looked at porn, masturbated, or orgasmed (not counting dreams). I've experienced many positive changes and have achieved an important goal. Now that I've re sensitized my brain, I'll reflect on the last 60 days.

This is going to be a quick check in.

Today is ~ 40 days w/o porn, masturbation, or orgasm. March 18th was my start date. I've had 5 or 6 dreams so far with porn in them. I've always jerked off or tried to in my dreams. I wake up relieved that I'm still on the train. After I have a porn dream, the next day I'm much more tempted to give in the urge. I haven't. So I've had around 5 or 6 days which have been tough. The rest have been relatively easy.

It's been an up and down few weeks. Stuff has been very stormy in my personal life, but despite a few "near misses" on the porn front, I haven't had a full-blown relapse.

Interestingly, I came close today, but looking at some of the stuff I used to masturbate to, just doesn't arouse interest any more.

I find normal 'sexy' images of women to be erotic, more so than before - I had definitely become desensitised, that seems to be rebalancing slowly.

No urge to orgasm today... still some slight pull to look at porn sites on the PC, but it's force of habit driven rather than desire. Not particularly difficult to resist, just fill my time with something else!

Not much else to report!

Had sleep deprived night due to child, and had trouble getting to sleep.

Tried the masturbation without orgasm thing last night, which was quite comforting (watching our child and learning about sleep associations, this is probably one I still have from infancy), with no fantasy, and drifted off (without orgasm).

Well, day 3 started with the need to orgasm, whilst I was half asleep. Woke up in considerable physical discomfort!

So I masturbated, and use fantasy a little to get things going, but it was gently sensual rather than pornographic in content. Felt no urge to turn up the volume mentally, was just enjoying taking my time.