bingeing

"The truth that makes men free is for the most part the truth which men prefer not to hear".
Herbert Agar

Been almost 3 week since I wrote my last post here. I manage to reach 15 days without PMO but binge for the next 6 days. Got up on the horse again and have been pmo free for a week now. So that's 22 of 28 days free from PMO not bad . I don't feel guilty for having released, I learned from the experience to be always on my guard because I am having a battle with myself and the mind will try to employ any tricks to seek a short-term relief.

COMMENTS: It's food, but it's a natural reinforcer, like sexual stimuli. This research demonstrates once again that binge patterns with natural reinforcers alter the reward/motivation pathways. Binge patterns in food and gambling have been shown to lower dopamine (D2) receptors. The numbed pleasure response. This leads to a craving for more dopamine stimulating stuff - sex, drugs, and rock & roll. However, this study measures sensitization of dopamine pathways. Sensitization means - an above normal release of dopamine in response to stimuli.

I made a comment that I felt there were distinct differences in my perception of hangover following a joint sexual episode with my spouse, versus a retreat to the solo bubble events, whether a one time or a bubble binge. As with us all - I can only describe the viewpoint from my perspective/perception.

Ugh - the physical effects I'd forgotten since hadn't binged in so long - headache, sleep schedule totally bolloxed up, heartburn, a struggle to focus at work. I'm behind on many things, including responses here.

I am not going to kid myself - while my recent return to aversion bubble solo binge behavior is not of the magnitude that such binges often were in the past, I am essentially guilty of binge behavior in the form of 3 episodes over the weekend - the 3rd was Sunday (yesterday), and therefore I am little more than 24 hours out of the last episode. Yes, I know that some times for many of us even a day or two - or even a few hours sometimes - is a success/positive step.