Last night, while out to dinner, I encountered an attractive woman who triggered me. There was something about her; she was kind of in my face, standing a little too close and giving me like this penetrating eye contact. I think she was flirting; I'm not very good at picking that up. But I definitely was receiving some kind of energy from her. On the way home from dinner, I caught myself thinking about her a couple of times. After that, I didn't sleep well.
I'm having a rough day. I know those happen. There have been many positives also. Would it be possible to link me to success stories and recoveries/potential timelines for weird tastes switching back to normal? Otherwise, I'm doing ok. Pretty productive, and living life, and definitely no porn. This is just to give me motivation and a little encouragement. Cheerleading, let's say.
I'm glad to have a chance to reach out. Would welcome responses. I have battled with porn for many years. Would love to stop. I remarried 9 years ago to an Austrian lady and brought her here to Canada. Now she wants to move back....I'm not making her happy. Life is hard.
Will share more later.
Yes, I am hitting the 60 day mark with no orgasm and porn is less of a temptation. I do have urges to act on my bottom lines, but I remember how much I enjoy being more grounded and together. Plus there is a lot to lose from acting out. It's not just the act, but there is the whirlwind that surrounds it. It is not something that I can do without it affecting my life in big ways. This thought is what has been keeping me abstinent lately.
Our love making has become really wonderful, but it's been happening in fits and starts. My wife says she will prioritize it, but hasn't really. We've been bonding almost every night, which has helped, but at times [like right now] I feel frustrated because we're not having enough intercourse. I don't know what to do about it.
Wasn't going to post for a little bit, but the nightmares are horrible. Yesterday, dreams of being in a chemical attack. I dismissed it, because I didn't know if it was porn-related. Today, dreams of being the center man in a very-multiple person porn situation, but actually feeling the disgust of the other guys around me. Also, to replace the porn habit last time, I was peeping into other apartments.
I have seen all over this site stories of how a person (mostly men, but not exclusively) goes X days without O then "relapses" into a PMO binge. I have noticed this in my life as well (before I found yourbrainonporn and the whole thing pissed me off) and have come to the conclusion that a cold turkey approach to PMO is a recipe for disaster.
it has been. Last night, my wife offered a back massage. After a little alcohol to relax my low back, she spent a fair amount of time working on what is one of my trouble spots. She told me this morning that I immediately crashed and went straight to snoring when she was done. This morning, my back is in much better condition. The only thing I could have done to improve it more would have been to take a muscle relaxant about an hour before, but that wasn't actually necessary.