It's been a while since I have been able to fully write out blogs and insights for everyone. So I hope this one would help out somehow.
I have been reading a lot of relapse posts recently, and I got a bit frustrated that I am doing well on my Rehabilitation, and while I am successful with what I have been doing, others seem to fall apart.
To beat oneself up, is to drown oneself further to an experienced suffering.
We are all Rehabilitating, and the best way for us to fully Recover and get our lives back to the way we want to be is to appreciate every goal we achieve, may it be in small steps. Every day as we move to a brighter life ahead of us, we seem to get anxious about how long it has been since our last PMO episode. When we have sexual and horny thoughts, we immediately get worried what this means, or have we relapsed,and our worries are so plenty that we get frustrated, thus we beat ourselves up for not being strong enough.
My dear friends, everyday of our recovery will be tested with different temptations. It is quite normal we get confused, we tend to try to explain why this and that is happening. We rationalize our reactions, and even get worried. But the key to a great Recovery is that we don't beat ourselves up. We already are aware how our brain works, thinks, and reacts, so the more important thing is that we already know what to do. To relax, and not let these thoughts define what we really, who we really are, and what we wanna achieve in our Recovery.
When we feel that temptations are going on through our minds, before we react, we must count 1-50, so that we aren't carried away by our immediate compulsive reactions which are most of the time negative reactions to situations which might let end us up to beating and berating ourselves to depression. Every time we are able to stay strong from tests, it is more advisable to give ourselves a pat on our backs, and congratulations. With every small step to achievement, gives us more strength to move forward. Our reaction to situations is just like a muscle that needs exercise. If we exercise appreciation and happiness in every thing we do, we are able to stay strong in positive perception of things. To constantly give ourselves rewards for every healthy thing we do for ourselves, we are able to enjoy and to want more rewards, thus we do more healthy stuff for our mind and body.
I hope I am making sense