Aphrodites Chela's blog

♥The Soul of Sex

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"The Soul of Sex: Cultivating Life as an Act of Love" Thomas Moore http://www.careofthesoul.net/wr_temple.htm
Gotta love a book that has pages and pages about Aphrodite. Tho I must admit I'm finding Artimis quite attractive these days.
There is soooo much forgiveness in this man's writing.
[quote=William Blake]Man has no Body distinct from the Soul
For that called Body is a portion of the Soul
Discerned by the five Senses,
The chief inlets of the Soul in this age.[/quote]"Unless we have lost imagination completely, when we look at the body we are seeing the soul...."

Notes to My Love

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Going to Work

I cross over the ridge top, leaving the Eel River
I'm dropping down, halfway up the canyon side, headed towards the Russian.
Old oaks, manzanita, fir acroos the way, grass, and blackened areas from summer fires.

I am 45 minutes and 20 miles from home
I feel it in the center of my chest, a pulling on my breast bone.
Then a slight thrilling chill passes though my body
Followed by a feeling of happy/sadness
Happy to love you so, sad to be leaving.

This is what happens to me as I pass through that invisible barrier

♥Desire

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19 months on the path, kind of

[quote=Keith Shein "Rumors Of Buildings To Live In"]
Never enough.
Now the boy wonders if he has the right desires,
what a better man might want,
whether there's a desire more pure.[/quote]
Thinking about y'all

Laying with my Isadora last night, I was looking for my gifts. How do I give, when I want so much?
My mistake with karezza was to want it, expect it, feel entitled to it..... substituting my desire for orgasm for wanting intimate connection.

21 Days

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Marnia asked, "How ya doin'?"
By day 3 after my May Day O, and up to day 8 I was crazy talking in my head and thinking divorce. Now at day 21 I'm definately calmed down. Day 16 and 17 she came to my bed and day 20 I was in hers. Gawd it helps. [quote=Marnia]Just know...
that things will change by Day 15.[/quote]

Lama Yeshe

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Thanks hotspring for the book recommendation. I very much like what he says about using, not renoouncing, one's deisre to gain enlightenment. But I'm running into some problems. The 3 prerequisites for practicing Tantra are in direct contradiction to the value I place on my Self. The Guru Papers address this issue. I'm finding myself trying to decode what he's saying so I can integrate the information. That's why I left the christian church. I had to keep redefining what they were saying so I could swallow it.

Why Stay?

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From Context http://www.reuniting.info/node/3792#comment-21276
My response to Lazarus Arisen, about 24 hours after my one stroke orgasm
Sun, 2010-05-02 07:34 — Aphrodites Chela Ok...not a doormat
I'm more like a pair of comfortable shoes. Available when needed. Not too shabby and very supportive. Something reliable to put on for a walk, to run errands and to wear dancing. I like that. It works well for me too. I'm just not very good at sitting on the shelf. Hotspring speaks of memory. I remember all too well when I was new and cherished, cared for and cleaned.

Wanting Orgasmic Sex

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Almost 4 days and I want sex. I want orgasm. I've been sliding. Now I want to give up. Giving up the pursuit of orgasm revealed my need for affection. I haven't been able to change enough to get my wife interested. For her, if there is no O why go? I was getting more cuddle time by heating her up. The problems in our relationship (my need, her coolness) seem to cycle on their own. The impact of an orgasm doesn't seem all that great when looking at the big picture of who we are. Wanting the orgasm is easy compared to wanting affection.

Context

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Last night she offered nothing in bed. We read, and I took her into my arms ("taking" is the operative word) before leaving. Today I wake up horny and full of sex fantasies. I want to lay out a sex/karezza scenario for us to play out. This is a problem because, for her, there is no context. This is true too when I look at porn and get all jacked up. I can spend an hour/s thinking about sex. What she gets, apparently out of the blue, is "Whammo! Baby let's ball!" This is my greatest gift and compliment. How can she refuse? What's wrong with her?

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