First Karezza experience. Success!

Submitted by ATL on
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My first step here was eliminating porn, which I've done successfully for about 110 days now. Then I sought to stop masturbating, which was a lot harder to do, although I've been "clean" for about two weeks now from masturbating. Finally, tonight I told my girlfriend I wouldn't be orgasming. She was a little surprised at first, although I had talked about trying Karezza before. So she did have an idea about what it's all about.

My impetus to finally give Karezza a shot with my girlfriend was another one of my orgasm "benders" which I've discussed on here before. I had 11 orgasms in 6 days, and I just felt like crap. I wasn't sleeping, I had that sorta tired, unmotivated, blah feeling. My attitude toward my girlfriend was one of total indifference. HOCD was bad again, and really bothering me.

So tonight we gave it a shot. It was fantastic, and she loved it, which is a relief to me. We went slow, tried a variety of positions, and just enjoyed ourselves in a very relaxed and sensual way. I was a little surprised at how I was able to keep from orgasming and just find a "zone" where I felt good and not like I was escalating. I sorta went back and forth from this really intense NEED for her, and then settling back down into just enjoying the sensations. I was really surprised to look at the clock and discover we'd been doing it for almost an hour. I really didn't notice time fly by.

Right afterward we went to dinner with a couple friends of ours. In the car on the way, we were so touchy and amorous. We were both just feeling "WOW" about the whole experience. I felt fantastic. I was quick witted, charming, focused at dinner. I just felt "on my game." My social anxiety and feeling of social awkwardness were very low. I felt confident.

We came home and cuddled for about another 30 minutes before she had to go home. I showed her the "orgasm v. performance" video that Marina posted and she was very intrigued by it. I was hesitant to change our love-making style, and worried about how she would react to it, if she would like it as much. But her response has been great, she seemed to really really enjoy it.

I realize maybe this is a placebo effect, or maybe I can't expect this kind of success in the future. But it was a really great first experience, and it has given me a lot of confidence to keep going with it. One of the most important factors being that my girlfriend was really happy with our first foray into it.

Many thanks to Marina and everyone on this site for contributing positively to my life.

ATL

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WOW

a WOW experience. Good for you!

You can be successful 100% of the time with Karezza. There is no failure. Only having an amazing time and learning something perhaps. I'm so thrilled you and your girlfriend are thrilled.

The best thing about Karezza is that you aren't trying to go somewhere. You are already successful when you two get together in penis in vagina time it's already a success. No need to go anywhere, or meet anyone's metrics. 

I find this "Karezza philosophy" becoming more of a core of my life. And no wonder. Isn't the sex drive fundamental to human beings? As you grow into not moving somewhere else all the time, and as your mind becomes steeped in that oxytocin chemistry, your satisfaction with where you are skyrockets. You may still want to move somewhere or do something else but it isn't dissatisfaction that drives you. 

On a practical note, the more cuddling you do, and the more Karezza, the easier it is to quit masturbation and porn. It becomes dead easy when this comes alive in your life. There is no feeling of lack anymore in your sex life. Masturbation serves no purpose anymore. 

I went from masturbating all the time since maybe 10 years old, to not having masturbated in almost a year, and not missing it a bit. The only way I could do this, was because of Karezza and daily bonding with my wife. The bonding we do, like 30 to 60 minutes a day, is the highlight of my day and makes everything else so much brighter. I have no interest in masturbation or porn anymore.

Good luck to you and keep writing about your experiences. I am eager to read about them.

Nah mate

>I realize maybe this is a placebo effect, or maybe I can't expect this kind of success in the future.

It just gets better and better! Trust the feeling and go with it.

Glad you tried it

I think it can be really helpful for lots of guys who overconsumed porn. It delivers all the soothing benefits of intimacy without the neurochemical roller coaster ride that can show up as brainworms of all kinds.

@emerson - great points about

@emerson - great points about incorporating the Karezza philosophy into more of your life. I like that idea. Being present and enjoying the moment, without feeling like you have to be going somewhere. Thank you for your thoughts.

@treehouse - thanks for the encouragement!

@marina - That's true, it is certainly soothing and I'm not dragging today like I would be if I had orgasmed. I'm actually really energized.

My girlfriend and I are about to take a road trip for the next week, with several stops, and we're both excited to do some more Karezza and cuddling all along the way. It's funny, I feel like after our experience last night I'm even more excited for our trip.

I'm having a little bit of an HOCD spike this afternoon, but I'm in such a good mood it doesn't bother me too much.

ATL

Yeah, the spikes

may show up for a while. Brain loops don't fade instantly. But as long as you can swat them away like flies, the wait is bearable.

Glad you're feeling jazzed...instead of jizzed. Sorry, couldn't resist.