I'm an attractive fucking man who can't get it up! I get signals women practically every time I leave my house! I know this sounds like bullshit but I swear I am just saying it how it is! Girls smile at me all the time! Today for instance I was sitting in Caffe Nero reading Slaughterhouse-Five just minding my own business and this absolutely beautiful girl walks in and sits down right next to me. I hadn't noticed her walk in as I was reading. There were chairs and couches available all over the cafe but she made it a point to sit down right next to me, and I wasn't sitting in some amazingly exceptional, marble shrine area either. I heard a 'hello', looked up from my book to see a face so beautiful I instantly felt tongue tied, and she asked if she could sit on the couch I was sitting on. I said of course, put my bag down, and so she sat.
She was my exact perfect type, Spanish/Italian brunette looking, just absolutely perfect, the kind of girl I can fall in love with. I didn't look up from my book once she was seated. I felt awkward as hell. After about fifteen minutes I got up and left. Haha.
I know this sounds like I'm being incredibly conceited but this kind of stuff has happened to me before. I remember second week during university I was just sitting in the common room talking to people in my dorm and this drunk girl whom I had spoken with before (while she was sober) walked in wearing her pajamas and sat on my lap. She was totally wasted, not exceptionally attractive, but you know, shaggable sure. Since I had no experience then and felt like I'd be taking advantage of her if I did something so I picked her up and took her back to her room.
One time I was at this pub with my friends and these drunk Polish girls sitting across from us came over and start talking to us. I noticed two of them looking over their shoulder at me and smiling. I smiled back. Then a few others of them came over. This girl was just like, "Oh my god, you are so handsome! You look really nice!" and she was really attractive blonde, too. She started complaining about her boyfriend back home while she was sitting next to me, haha, and she even gave me her address for crying out loud.
Another time I was standing at a bus stop with my friend just talking to him and this gorgeous drunk girl in a red dress started blowing kisses at me, I swear to god, and she wouldn't stop doing it! She kept doing it for like three minutes until her bus showed up while I just stood there awkwardly knowing I couldn't do anything about it. Once I was in an elevator at the Hilton at about 11 pm going to my friend's room. This American woman was inside and she actually started chatting me up... like women chat ME up, I don't even have to say anything. She offered me sex right there! She asked me my name, I told her and she replied that it was pretty. She then asked what I was doing tonight and I said I was just going to my friend's place briefly and that would be it. She licked her lips and said to me, "the night is young." IF I HAD A WORKING DICK I COULD HAVE GONE TO HER ROOM AND FUCKED HER. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN THE HOTTEST ONE NIGHT STAND EVER.
These are just a few examples. There are many, many more.
Ugh. I'm sorry to be such a vain prick but can you imagine how shitty I feel? Every time I'm out I can basically get a girl's number without a problem. If I had a dick that worked I could get laid pretty much every single night... but I'm cursed. And then there are girls I've liked in the past that I could have had the most incredible relationships with but it all went to hell because I couldn't do it. I still see women express interest in me ALL THE TIME, even if it's just something as trivial as a smile. I just know when a girl likes me, and I know all I have to do is ask her out, but I don't do anything 'cause I know I'm broken.
Can you imagine how this has shaped me as a person? It's destroyed me. I could have been alpha as fuck but now I have nothing but regret and 'all that could have been but wasn't'. Goddammit.