Cassius's blog

Eft - here we go

Submitted by Cassius on

Hello everyone.

I HAVE to share this right know.

An hour ago I felt rejected like hell because the girl I'm supposed to have a date with tomorrow didn't react to my call.

So over the span of two hours or so all my thinking that I will never have a girlfriend, never have sex again and so forth got me quite some intense cravings and the thought of relapsing felt all too good.

And once the cravings come, my mood sinks even deeper, it's a self fulfilling prophecy.

EFT - Emotional freedom technique

Submitted by Cassius on

Has anyone tried this and had good results with it?

I wonder, if I can actually tap away my cravings as this is a most negative emotion for me and at times it is almost a feeling as strong as being really hungry or having a lot of pain. So I think, that EFT should work well with it.

I tried this for a few days now and I'm not so sure, but I think it might actually work, to at least reduce those cravings for masturbation quiet a bit but I'm a total beginner with this and I'd like to hear from others, if they have tried this technique, to get over their addiction.

Day 317 - What's right or wrong?

Submitted by Cassius on

Well, I was at a good, long streak of abstinence from MO again but yesterday, at day 54, I messed up.

I didn't want to but once I started touching myself, doing this touch-rewiring-program, and realized that I wasn't getting hard, I started to edge, stopped, couldn't find sleep, started to M again half an hour later and puff, all self discipline gone with the wind. Another orgasmn with a near limp dick, hooray.

Day 302 - Feeling better

Submitted by Cassius on

Hello everyone,

I just wanted to mention that I've done the 300 day mark without prone masturbation. Isn't this quite incredible? From doing it once or twice a day to stopping, relapsing again and again and now I'm clean for nearly 10 full months. Insane :)

I've had good periods of days lately where my cravings are absolutely managable. Still - The bad days always strike back and depression and cravings are hard to deal with at these days. But maybe, just maybe, I'm having them a little less in the past couple of weeks.

Day 271- Why hope simply isn't enough.

Submitted by Cassius on

Hello everyone.

More than one year and two months have passed since i decided to stop my addiction to prone masturbation.

At first it was quite impossible. Failure over failure, attempt after attempt, falling for the same cravings every single time. Then I did the two months mark and whoooa...... nothing. No changes.

Day 205 - Gonna make it seven months and more!

Submitted by Cassius on

Yeah well, I feel like posting today. 205 days without prone masturbation, 57 days of total abstinence from MO.

Nothing really happened in terms of socialising and of course ED is still around. Cravings have been a little less the last couple of days.
I still get peaks through the day when it's very very hard not to relapse right away. But I'm pushing through all the time.

Day 201

Submitted by Cassius on

Today is day 201 without prone masturbation for me. Day 53 without MO.

I'm into serious rebooting for more than a year now and I'm without acting out my addiction for more than a half. Porn is out of the game since early march 2011.

So far there are absolutely no results with healing ED.

Day 191 - had a very nice day

Submitted by Cassius on

Hello everyone,

it is day 191 since I stopped masturbating prone and day 43 of total abstinence from MO.

Yesterday I had a date with a wonderful girl and we had a really nice day while walking in the sun, visiting her city and talking about this and that. We had funny and at other times quite deep conversations and it felt really good to open up a bit to her.

After some time I felt a very strong desire to cuddle with her but I didn't want to push things too fast and so I didn't ask her to cuddle with me.

Day 184 - loosing hope

Submitted by Cassius on

Hello everyone,

I think it might be a good time to write a little bit and get some opinions, maybe writing alone helps a little bit to cope with cravings today.

I'm very, very frustrated these last days. I'm more than half a year clean from prone masturbation and I'm still not seeing any progress at all. I'm at day 36 of total abstinence from MO, too.

Lately I'm thinking that this whole process for me is more than counterproductive.