Day 35, again. Hopefully the last time I reach day 35. Not much going on. Just finished mid-terms for school.I am not sure if it is the lack of porn (been quitting/relapsing for 15 months) or the sobriety from Marijuana (15 months sober) but I have definitely been on my A-game as far as my education goes. I am currently taking 14 units this semester and easily holding a 4.0 GPA across the board.
Been trying to socialize more but not get to caught up in thinking about or forcing the issue. Chat with woman for the sake of conversation not to get into their pants. Puts a whole lot less pressure on myself. And more importantly, focus on school, focus on my future, and the rest will fall in place eventually.
Physically, I am a stud. Since giving up Marijuana and Cigs and slowly tapering off porn, I have got into incredible shape. I have cut my body fat down from 14% to 8% while putting on quite a bit of muscle. I also went out and purchased clothes that not only fit me, but give me some style. I can definitely feel the woman staring me down as I walk through the city in a sleeveless shirt. I have about 4-5 woman on my jock from school and the barber shop where I get my haircut but I am just playing coy for the time being. This time it is their turn to sweat it out. When things happen... it will happen, but I am not going out of my way to chase some tail for the time being. I feel like I need to let myself heal mentally from the years and year of porn before I make any moves.
I ran into my old boss yesterday at the grocery store. He says to me in his Korean accent " You look very handsome. You always were handsome but you look even healthier." I laughed knowing how screwed up I was on porn,drugs and alcohol when I used to work for his construction company years ago. It feels good being sober! Yea buddy!