Long time, no post. With each relapse I learn something new, reinforce my beliefs against porn and start the next battle. Although today only marks the 83rd day PMO free, my war against PMO began nearly 30 months ago. In those 30 months a lot has changed.
I went from smoking Marijuana daily to being 2.5 years sober.In the same length of time, I went from being a chain-smoker to nicotine free.
Once an overweight man, now shredded at 7% body-fat. I spent most of my spare time playing online video games. Now, I spend that time going to school. Two years ago, going to college was out of the question. How could I? I was too anxious, lethargic, exhausted and lazy. At the end of this semester I will graduate with my Associates degree in Computer Science and transfer to CSU.
My latest challenge has been giving up caffeine. Don't laugh just yet! Many will scoff at the idea of giving up caffeine as its "normal" for us Americans to indulge. But ask yourself, how many have said the same thing about giving up P. M. or O. ? A solid four weeks out and I am starting to feel great. For one, I feel much less stressed for obvious reasons. Caffeine causes cortisol (the stress hormone) to sky rocket. I get much better sleep along with more sustained energy throughout the day. For once I feel that my mood has stabilized. Before, I could either feel incredibly great or dramatically snappy moment to moment. Another negative effect of caffeine is insulin levels. Pubmed.org has several publicized studies that shows the relation between insulin spikes and caffeine. What does this mean? Although caffeine suppresses appetite for the short-term, by the end of the day, hunger will ultimately win. Recent studies have also shown that spiked insulin and highly glycemic foods can cause breakouts. Although caffeine-free lifestyle is not for everyone, it was definitely a step in the right direction for myself.
My biggest task has been finding myself a lovely woman to spend my time with. I need to date! I need to meet new woman! Fortunately, I will have plenty of opportunities with my new classes coming up. Summer school will include Spanish, English-writing 301, Music History and Nutrition. And for fall semester I am registered for Data-Structures, Trig, Sociology and Spanish 2. Best way to stay away from porn is keeping myself busy!
Talk to you later.