17 years old rebooting update

Submitted by dublife on
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1 month and 2 weeks have passed since i started my reboot. But some things happend since my last blog entry that i am not proud of. First of all i still did not tell to my girlfriend about my problems , I am still afraid to do it. As i told you, i had some sexual intercorses , most of them did not went that well becouse i could not mentain an erection , simply from hard or hard enough to limp when i was about to penetrate, all of those intercorses were made with hookers (shame on me). So a week ago i made one of the baddest decisions, i did not masturbate, i did not watched porn, maybe this is worst , i let you jugde it. I went to a hooker, i surfed an ads site , saw some pictures, called a few until i decided , i made my choice and went there.She was nice, young , smelled good, kind. There was no foreplay , she got right into business . I wasn't hard when she started a blowjob, i did not even got the chance to get fully hard and i cumed. I was shocked, i got scared , felt full of anxiety, ashamed . I did this becouse i wanted to eliminate the anxiety of penetration, to work it out better with my girlfriend, i failed .
Anyway , i slept at my girlfriend 2 nights (2 days ago and last night). We just cuddle and i satisfied her oraly and that's it , I expected her want to return the favor and satisfy me with a handjob or something , but it didn't happen , even if she did i would stop her becouse i want to lisen to Marnia's advice and try to avoid orgasming fo a while. After last night , i woked up with a wood, not 100% but it was pretty hard and it lasted a few minutes. Still , the fact that my girlfriend did not had any interes in pleasing me poped up some self-questioning like "dose she care about me?". I feel depressed sometimes , nothing seems to work out. Just for the record, i don't look bad, actualy i get compliments quite often, i am a sports guy, i did karate for 4 years and a month a go i started going to gym. I don't understand why things have to be so complicated. Anxiety , ED , PE , what's next?

Comments

she may care about you

but she is holding back from satisfying you. Maybe she senses you aren't there with her 100%. Maybe she doesn't want to encourage you. Maybe she was having a tough time for other reasons that don't have anything to do with you.

Sorry it didn't work out with the prostitute. It's really difficult to not cum but it's better if you don't for awhile. Once you get through this, hopefully you'll be more sensitive in your penis and more able to have intercourse without worrying about your erection.

The thing is that when i'm

The thing is that when i'm with her i put aside any anxiety and try to connect with her, the anxiety occures only when i try to penetrate.
Well it's hard not to have any sexual fun with her becouse she will notice something is wrong, in fact she want to do it, she is a virgin as i told you, but she decided she want to lose her virginity with me. I don't know how to avoid that without telling her my problems, i simply don't. The thing is that my girlfriend told me i was even the first to recive a handjob. So I find myself in this nasty situation where my girlfriend wants to do it and i....can't. I don't want to lose her, i finaly found a nice girl , good girl and got the serios relationship that i craved so much and i found out that i have severe porn-induced ED and severe anxiety + nasty PE( i guess the PE is caused by my anxiety) my anxiety may be caused by the fact that i went to hookers, it's just a guess. I really don't know what to do next and don't mess this up.

dublife

1. Your anxiety will disappear once you have rebooted and rewired your brain away from porn. Meanwhile, NO sex for you, do NOT look at porn in any way and don't touch your penis or have her touch your penis in any sexual way.

2. Until then sex may not work well for you.

3. It will all work very well after reboot and rewiring, probably.

4. If you are serious about this girl, why not tell her you are having some issues and want to take things slow?

5. If she really likes you, she'll be okay with it.

6. Show some leadership and some of your wonderful qualities of initiative. Be the man in the relationship and tell her how it's going to be.

7. Get her cooperation and help. 

8. Avoid sexual thoughts, fantasies and activities.

9. Do a ton of cuddling, eye gazing, holding hands, naked snuggling.

10. Wait until you start getting strong erections without touching your penis. That will happen.

11. Focus on gratifying her orally and manually and all the wonderful things you can do to help her feel good.

12. Get really good at satisfying her slowly and wonderfully with great oral and hand technique. Give her long drawn out orgasms. This can be a great time to learn how to satisfy a woman.

13. You'll be fine and the anxiety will drain away.

Try not to worry

that she doesn't care about you. If she's a virgin, she doesn't want to awaken that "insatiable urge" everyone has been telling her men have. Wink Let this work in your favor. And tell her about your favorite non-erotic touch so she knows how to please you without over-exciting you. Do you like back massages? Back scratching? Head rubs? Foot masages? Broaden your horizons. Wink Playful ideas on this page: http://www.reuniting.info/resources/exchange_of_the_day