I learned a new "trick" today in Karezza this morning.
I can relax my root and draw the pleasure up into my whole body. It is simply astounding. Don't know what to call it but it is extremely and amazingly pleasurable. It's a full body experience and kind of like an orgasm but not in the genitals but all over.
I think you achieve that when you get good at focusing on your root (I don't know where a female would focus, on her breasts possibly or her pelvic floor?). It's a variation of "The Big Draw" but I didn't really pay a lot of attention to that Mantak Chia description except to read it once or twice awhile back.
When I lose my focus it goes away, but I could play with my attention and it came back. Just wonderful, really very similar to an orgasm but whole body and not a peak draining type experience and not a genital experience. No ejaculation.
And now let me tell you about the other part of this.
My partner was kind of out of it today as she is stressed out about a trip we're going on soon, but that didn't matter all that much for me. It bothered me a little but not that much. I'm learning...
...and it feels weird to say it but I've learned how important it is to focus on myself and not on my partner. She has taught me this very well. If I worry about her arousal and her pleasure, I get out of the zone and it isn't good for her either. She doesn't like it. I realize that if I'm focused on myself it works out much better.
This is very different from "mating sex" where it was all about getting her aroused.
This happens all the time, as it did this morning: I can feel her energy passing and her body responding but afterwards she says "I'm stressed out, I didn't feel anything." But she did, I know she did, her body felt it, it responded, everything was a "go" but her cerebellum didn't get the message from the amygdala. It is blindingly obvious that her body "got" it.
But I'm okay with that. I will tell her that when we chat next about my favorite subject. And that's why I don't see this as selfish, really, although it sounds like it is. I guess that's why I'm posting about it. It does seem selfish but I don't think it really is.