I have begun to realize more nuances of things that affect me similar to having an orgasm.
For instance, fantasy. I can feel a surge of dopamine and it feels like sexual fuel being added to the fire. But it's not "good" fuel. It's "ejaculation" fuel. And after awhile I find that such fuel makes my wife feel less attractive and makes sex more difficult.
I avoid fantasy pretty well but sometimes unavoidably it rears its ugly head.
Same thing with seeing a parade of scantily clad pretty young girls. Same thing. I can defocus my eyes or not really look, but if I really look and absorb, I find it affects my sex with my wife.
What do you find?