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Anyone else has had issues with printed story erotica porn?

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Submitted by emerson on

I didn't come here for recovery purposes, although maybe I did. My issue was that I masturbated to printed erotica. Videos never did it for me for some reason, mostly because I wasn't that interested in the scenes they depicted, although a few spoke to my core fantasy which is more domination and spanking oriented.

I have given up masturbation completely and all forms of porn completely and it hasn't been difficult primarily I think because I have a loving life partner and have replaced the porn outlet with Karezza and cuddling activities.

breasts sensitivity, ticklishness before arousal

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Submitted by emerson on

The Tantric Sex books by Diana Richardson say that breasts are the gateway to stimulation for women as opposed to clitoral stimulation. What if a woman's breasts are very sensitive or ticklish? Is there any way to desensitize or does this ever change? It seems to be not a problem once a woman is sufficiently aroused, but my question is about breast sensitivity/ticklishness before that happens...

♥just hangin' out, naked cuddles, patience

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Submitted by emerson on

I think Sood said something about a naked cuddle and that's what we've been doing. It's pretty ace to be honest.

I am leaving everything to my lovely Sparkles.

Whatever happens or doesn't is up to her.

I recognize that all these years things have been pretty male dominated. When I was done, we were done. And so forth. So now it's changed.

♥ I get very turned on just cuddling

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Submitted by emerson on

Every time we cuddle, which now is before bedtime and when waking, I get very aroused. Is this good, bad, any suggestions, or experiences?

I enjoy it a great deal and it is quite satiating in itself. So nothing wrong with it. But as I embark on this Karezza expedition I want to not fall into any old patterns without at least re-examining them.

Sparkles explained that when we cuddle she doesn't feel that way at all. So there is a huge difference.

Any comments welcomed. Thanks

♥ yeast infections

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Submitted by emerson on

My wife has over the last few years post-menopausally been sensitive to yeast infections.

I think this new way of doing things promotes much more lubrication and there is no ejaculation of course either. I doubt she'll have a problem.

But after PIV she jumps up to urinate and take a shower. I think over time she'll find this is not a worry, but what has been your experience? Thanks

♥my wife and I reached an agreement

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Submitted by emerson on

Sparkles was deeply worried that I would be unhappy now that I quit masturbating and am looking solely to our sexual union to meet my needs.

I in turn became very clingy and needy and altogether unpleasant.

We had some conversations about it. I said, let's try to have regular snuggly time, with or without intercourse, every day, before bedtime and upon waking.

She said, that seems too rules based and mechanical.

Porn interferes with how we imprint our core fantasy?

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Submitted by emerson on

I think we imprint on a particular core fantasy when we are maybe 10, 11, 12, whatever.

Then that's what does it for us in our sex life. That particular core fantasy is what gets us off more than anything else. It's a fantasy, yes, but it's also based in reality in some way. It isn't so off base because it originated in the world of living breathing molecular boys and girls.

Does "drippiness" - pre-cum release of semen = ejaculation?

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Submitted by emerson on

A great deal of the magic for me since I quite masturbating has been not ejaculating. I was with my wife and fooling around without sexual intent but I got aroused and I felt like I lost a good deal of ejaculate even though I didn't actually ejaculate. There was some fluid production beyond a few drips but short of a real ejaculation. Just wondered if this will continue, is normal, any suggestions. I have a kind of different less energized feeling afterward. Strange.

Thanks!

♥things are really changing for me

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Submitted by emerson on

As I write this, I am spending time in an area with a lot of beautiful women.

Recap: It's maybe been 3 or 4 weeks without any PMO and I've been doing karezza with my wife for a short while.

I went through a period of maybe 2 weeks when this first started, when I was very horny and had a great urgency and felt great pressure around sex.

It is different now.

The more time I spend with my beautiful wife even without orgasm the more thrilled I am and I don't feel that horny urgency anymore.

help recovering - my experience

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Submitted by emerson on

I started to masturbate when I was maybe 11 and quickly found fantasies to masturbate with, in Penthouse and a book called The _______.

I guess very early maybe 4 or 5 I didn't realize it but I found sexual pleasure in domination themes. I think this is built in somehow. So when I discovered the written word and pornographic stories I gravitated to those that had an S&M component.

Ditto with pornographic movies and videos although I never really got into these so much. I would use pornographic stories and read them and masturbate to these, often over an hour or two.

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