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sexual prosperity

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Submitted by emerson on

I thought I'd briefly discuss why this is such a wealthy practice, this Karezza.

I think I always lived in the past with my beloved with a state of lack, a state of fear of not getting enough sex. Fear that I wouldn't have an erection, or that it wouldn't last.

I know a lot of guys who feel the same way and they live that way.

When we had sex, it was to reach an orgasm or else it wasn't a success. When the orgasm was over, it was over. And as time went by, my beloved got more ordinary looking and I continued feeling that lack and that sense of anxiety.

pressure to have an orgasm

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I noticed today my lovely partner got aroused after a bit and was going for orgasm but didn't have one. She said she had fantasized during this time when she was having intercourse with me but didn't feel like having an orgasm. We're around day 28 for her since the last one. I asked her why she didn't and she said for some reason she didn't feel like it at some level.

I offered to help her out and she declined. I noticed a bit of a feeling of regret on my part, regretting that she didn't come even though in my heart I think that's better really.

Family Guy Episode on Cuddling

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The Family Guy episode that just aired, Mr. & Mrs. Stewie, has a subplot where Peter andLois Griffin is sleeping in a separate beds, and Peter misses the cuddling. So Peter proposes to Glen Quagmire that they cuddle by sleeping in the same bed. It's pretty funny actually although the main plot (Cate Blanchett guest voices) is quite dark.

I've noticed more attention recently in the popular media about cuddling and bonding behaviors in general.

here's what our Karezza experience looks like now

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Submitted by emerson on

Quick recap: I've been on this adventure since the middle of December.

Since then, no porn, no masturbation and no orgasms for me at all.

At first I was very needy and my partner and I had to work out this new way of living. I was so afraid of not getting enough sex.

It's smoothed out quite a bit. I'm not needy anymore. And she comes to me for comfort on her own and we sometimes have sex and we sometimes don't. We had sex four days in a row and none for a few days. We're really in sync now and I know what that means now.

when orgasms are infrequent, is the fallout worse?

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Submitted by emerson on

Just wondered this. She had an orgasm the other day. This time around it seems much worse in terms of fallout. She's had infrequent orgasms for the last 4 months compared to the old days. Is it common for the fallout to become worse with less frequency? Or is this something else perhaps?

The Penis Challenge

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Submitted by emerson on

A lot of guys here have said they don't feel their penis and I get that. I think we stuff our genitals in our underwear and kind of ignore them until we "need" them to urinate or for sex.

A few women here have done some breast focus and gotten some amazing results.

So in the last few days I've started meditating around feeling my penis.

Being aware of it.

Feeling it including the tip, shaft and what's underneath, the root, and the testicles.

is this a rebooting thing, anxiety or just something that will pass

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Submitted by emerson on

Today we spent a long time cuddling. I had written off sex for this morning.

Then I went on top and did soft entry. At some point we were kissing and the kisses changed quality, much more sensual and involved, more mutual. This is very unusual.

I kept my penis soft at her entrance and she was dry, then at some point she was wet and we made love for a bit. After awhile I pulled out. She said she felt it a lot more then ever before, and described the garden of love area and that somehow I had gone deeper and she had really felt it this time.

is she aroused? Too much focus on my partner?

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Submitted by emerson on

I am really having a great time with Karezza. This journey has been amazing.

I was realizing today that perhaps I worry or think too much about whether my partner is actually aroused and enjoying things.

I mean, I want her to be. But the real magic of Karezza happens when I go inside and am very present in my own body, lately with a focus on the root of my penis and my solar plexus. That's when things get amazing for me. And I think that I focus too much lately on how she's doing and what she's feeling.

Desiring desire?

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Submitted by emerson on

I said that there was something wrong. That she shouldn't be having sex with me and not getting aroused. It was either hormonal (which I doubt) or it was me, perhaps, and I understood that and want to change so I am no longer a source of pressure and defensiveness.

"I knew you wanted to do it"

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Submitted by emerson on

My wife loves me very much. Tonight we were laying down and she was tired, I could tell. And she started to stroke me and then said, do I want to come in? So I did. For a bit. Maybe 10 or 15 minutes. And then I stopped.

I asked her if she had enjoyed it. And she was honest, bless her heart. She said she wasn't really in the mood. I am always grateful for her honesty. I asked her why she invited me in. She said she knew I wanted to.

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