I can be too good at entertaining myself. This has always been the case even as a child and before the internet. I was fine playing with children or playing alone. This seems to have morphed into a life of seemingly limitless self-created distractions. This might be fed by our modern life. I’d be a pretty distracted off-grid hermit, monk, etc. I’d probably prefer off-grid distractions even though the aimless process would be the same. Perhaps this is like crashing software in which the code can run through various loops and not escape or get the desired task done. PMO was just one more loop. Some of the time, I’m not even sure what the desired task is. If I think back to playing as a child, I had little idea where my brain would take my play. Experiencing the world of and created by my own brain was entertaining enough. Desired tasks have a way of being their own distractions too. What we desire often isn’t even truly desired. It’s another loop. I’ve read plenty on value-based goals and living. It’s another distraction in way. . . another thing to think about and do while not doing whatever else one might do. Even if used well, it’s still plausible to get into the loops as one pokes his head into the many garden paths. I’m frustrating everyone around me and perhaps most of all myself. Perhaps I have to find a way to use these loops in some functional manner. Or maybe just give up and embrace this life to nowhere we all share. My nowhere is just as pointless as anyone else’s.