He rang me.
Before I could see him again to show him anything that I've been educating myself on, he's told me that it feels forced to change the way his mind has been operating for the last decade...and that all of this is making him feel distanced from me rather than closer to me.
He said he took this on to make me happy, but it's proved a lot harder than he initially expected. I guess the journey doesn't end here though...It's allowed us to talk about how we've been feeling of late and made us aware of our actions...
By taking what I've learnt in this brief time and applying it to our orgasmic lovemaking (well...his orgasmic experience...I think I'll stick to the no 'big O' path) then we can continue to develop a deeper love. Supposedly there is no right or wrong way about Karezza anyhow..? and I feel I've unlocked some spiritual door that I cannot close. I want to keep walking further and defining a higher sense of self; a pure love and appreciation for all things. I already feel more centred and secure than I did before. I feel luminescent and positive. Maybe one day my partner will have a better understanding of what it's all about...maybe somewhere deep within himself he already does..because..I told him that when I touch him it feels like my heart is going to overflow for him, and I told him that, I guess, I suggested this idea because I just wanted to know if that's how he felt too. He said that he did, he does, and he's going to prove to me and show me that he does. He knows that he got selfish. I also told him that I don't want him to touch me purely out of passion; that I want him to touch me out of adoration and appreciation.
He said he will, he wants to.
this is where the journey begins?
Orgasm or not, I know this love is real.