A week into my travels. After the disappointment of things not going to plan last weekend I am going full throttle with my 'get as healthy as possible' plan. I want to be in the best and most 'natural' state when I come back (day 90). I will do everything necessary to increase and get my sex drive back to 'normal'. I'm also intrigued to see how being free of intoxicants feels.
We spent the whole weekend together as it was my last in the country. We had decided to try having sex as I was at 7 weeks and it was the latest we could leave it (Marnia's advice). So I was really disappointed when on day 47 I couldn't feel any sex drive. She came round in the evening and we had a great meal. But in bed I could just feel things weren't going to happen. I told her I didn't have any drive today and she said we would give it a go in the morning.
These morning dreams are really crazy. This morning I was drifting in and out of sleep and I would be kissing, cuddling, or having sex with the girl I'm seeing and then I would wake up and feel around my bed and be unable to find her before realising she wasn't there and it was a dream. I've never experienced anything like this. I don't know if this is something to do with the reboot or this new relationship. We tend to cuddle and have 'sex' as soon as we wake up so maybe this is a part of it.
I had a crazy sexual dream this morning but in general I seem to of lost my sex drive a little recently. I went through some stuff with my ex, and have made the decision to make a career change, which has left me in a negative, anxious mood.
My lady came round to mine last night. It was cool to see her. Things got very passionate in the bedroom and progressed a lot from our previous sessions. We had intercourse but took it very slowly, almost being completely still at times, ensuring that I didn't O. It felt so good to be inside a woman and hard. I wasn't worrying about ED as I was completely caught up in the moment, just as things should be. This is the most turned on I have been in 4 months. It felt like an animal desire took over. I was panting for minutes after we calmed things to avoid me having an orgasm.
Felt hornier today than I think I have ever been. I woke up with a very flirtatious text from the girl I have been seeing. So from the moment I got out of bed I have felt turned on. Having problems focusing on anything today and haven't been very productive. Horny, horny, horny. It feels like a burning animal instinct. Like my body see's having sex as the most important thing right now.
So I was dosing in the morning, having a vivid dream where I was having sex. It felt so real. In the dream I was with a girl (can't be sure who she was) and I felt myself being so close to climaxing, then I woke up and my penis was full erect and I felt like I was about to orgasm. So I pulled down my underwear and without touching my penis I ejaculated.
I haven't had a wet dream since I was a teenager (14/15). I guess after 33 days my body needed to release. Is this normal during a reboot? Is this just a natural cycle i.e. would a wet dream occur at a similar interval if one doesn't O?
I woke up filled with sexual thoughts and found myself caressing my body (not my penis) in a slow sensual way (self Karezza?). This is exactly how I woke up with my lady the other morning. Perhaps in my sleepy state I wasn't completely sure which bed I was in.
Spent a cool day with a great lady I get on amazingly well with. We spent a chilled night at her place listening to old vinyl records (hadn't realised how social record players are). We took things very slowly. I was getting fully hard during foreplay, but my erections were coming and going. Wasn't hard at all when she was kissing around my dick as a build up to oral. Our 'sex' session lasted a couple of hours. We ended falling asleep whilst intertwined and kissing. I felt very connected to her that night.
My advice to anyone doing a reboot is to stay as busy as humanly possible. I spent the last few days launching a new company. This obsessive level of work definitely shifts your focus. Daily exercise similar is vital. Unfortunately I appear to of started smoking! One addiction for another. Damm my addictive personality!