or at least trying to. My wife is resisting my efforts to reconnect with her sexually. I don't blame her. For years I complained to her for not contributing to our sexual activities more...mostly being a passive recipient of my efforts. I would be the one getting her off, and I would be the one getting me off too. Of course, being rather desensitized by PMO, expecting her to get me off was not exactly reasonable.
Once getting off is no longer the focus, I feel no resentment towards her for the effort I put into our physical relationship. I gave her a much needed massage today, and will offer to do so daily. She's not quite buying it yet though...my not having expectations of equal effort on her part that is, but I have hope.
She has wanted to give up on us more than once in the last couple of years, but I have resisted. I have given her a deadline of sorts...if by the end of the year, she does not feel like we can reconnect, I will not resist her in a divorce. I hope it doesn't get to that point.
I need to be able to perform with her sexually before then, or at least we need to make enough progress for her to not want to throw in the towel.
Besides, throwing in the towel just creates more laundry.