I noticed while logging on this morning that I've been a member for about 3 and a half years. I haven't participated as much here, other than intermittent bursts, and I think I first acknowledged that I had a porn addiction about 10 years ago. So, while I've had the addiction for much longer, maybe 18 years?, I've been struggling with it since I've realized I had it.
I've read statements about commitment and the 'porn is not an option' mindset. I've used it in the past, and it has been effective. Just the past couple of days I used it and it remained effective... until it wasn't. there was something in the post about that mindset about making a choice, a commitment of never looking at porn again. If this is true then I haven't made that choice because I do relapse. I want to make that choice because I'm sick of struggling with this thing. I want it gone. I want that that mindset. I don't want to fall into pity and self loathing either. I want to work on this.
So I will.