Karezza Relationship

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Submitted by Louie on
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In a seperate thread I was asked if I feel stuck in my marriage. I answered that at length (I do not feel stuck) and I will not repeat that post here. However, I do want to explore an idea that came to me right at the end. It dawned on me that I am doing the entire relationship the same way that I would do an individual session of karezza.

I am moving forward very slowly. When I encounter resistance of some kind I do not attempt to push through it. I move back a bit and just stay there. There is something here that needs to be explored so I explore it. I stay with my wife at whatever level she is at until she loosens up and releases the tension at that level of our relationship. Then I move forward slowly until the next time that there is resistance.

In karezza sex it is a mistake to try and force your way in. The goal is not to get your penis in as fast as possible. You move at whatever pace is comfortable for both of you, and you take however much time is required.

In karezza relationship the same could be said about sex itself. The goal is not to get her in bed as fast as possible. You move at whatever pace is comfortable for both of you, and you take however much time is required.

I suppose you could say that the last three years have been one long penetration into the depths of my wife's heart. There have been numerous points where I had to stop and back up again. I am about 70% of the way in now. That is my gut feel on the whole thing. At this point, most of my tension is gone. I am in no hurry to get through that last 30%. I intend to enjoy every step along the way.

Karezza at the micro level, and the macro level too. It is karezza through and through.




I had not considered this before today, but as soon as it popped into my head it felt very right.

The way you do sex will reflect the way you do life as a whole and vice versa. I think that we tend to play out the same patterns at multiple levels. Start consciously chnaging how you operate at any one level, and all others will be affected.

Some people start by slowing down with sex and then they see that same attitude spread to every other area of life.

Others start in some other area of life and then see the same calm and patient energy come into their sex.

super insightful Louie

I find this is happening with me. I am turning the rest of my life into Karezza. It is just amazing to watch this unfold. I hadn't realized it yet until you pointed it out. Thank you.


[quote=Louie]The way you do sex will reflect the way you do life as a whole and vice versa.[/quote]

I remember reading somewhere that the way a person drives reflects the way they make love. I've noticed recently, I'm getting overtaken by everyone. The other day, a guy on a bike shot past as I was crawling along a country lane.

I've also acquired the habit of staying in high gears far longer than I should, not wanting to break the smoothness of the journey by changing down.

How's your driving, Louie? (Don't tell me you're a weekend drag racer!)


I like that too. For my part I'm guilty of hassling you sure enough, meant well enough, but really if you can be this patient and understanding then i should have the good grace to do the same!

Breath Treehouse, breathe.

No worries

I don't mind being called out. It forces me to think about why I do certain things, or take certain stances. Am I doing this from a place of love or a place of fear? It is good to be clear on such things. Sometimes the best way to get that clarity is to have someone else challenge you.

On my last forum I had one guy who called me out quite often in the early days. He thought my slow and patient approach was nuts. In some ways I changed because of his challenges. In other ways I firmed up what I was already doing. He respected that, and we ended up being really good friends.