Louie's blog

I am obviously rebooting

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Submitted by Louie on

When I first came here I thought that the concept of rebooting did not apply to me. I was never addicted to porn so I thought that I had nothing to reboot from. I was very wrong about that.

Since reading CPA I have weaned myself off of masturbation and fantasy. I thought this would cause my sex drive to rocket upward, but the opposite has happened. I have little sex drive at the moment.

My Theory On Why Karezza Works

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Submitted by Louie on

I like to try and reduce concepts down to the simplest possible way to explain them. Here is my attempt to explain why karezza is so magical.

I think the basic problem with the human condition is tension. We have mental tension. We have emotional tension. We have sexual tension, and we have physical tension. We have tension up the ying yang.

No more M for me

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Submitted by Louie on

I have mentionned this in other threads, but I thought that I should add it to my blog as well. I have made the decision to quit masturbation entirely.

I started self pleasuring when I was about 14. During my teen years I did it multiple times a day. Even as recently as a year ago I was having orgasms on an almost daily basis.

I told my wife that I want to ditch the condoms

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Submitted by Louie on

I started writing this as an addenum to my last blog post and then decided that it was substantial enough to be a blog post in its own right.

I recently told my wife that I would like to stop using condoms. I did not force the issue, I just stated a preference and told her why. I often lose my erection right after putting on the condom and then have to work to get it back again (usually by fantasizing). If you believe that the penis has its own intelligence then mine is obviously not happy to be in a condom.

Where we are at

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Submitted by Louie on

My wife and I are at an interesting point in our development as a couple. We are not having sex, yet we are being more intimate than we have ever been before. I was struggling to understand exactly what is going on with us, and I think that I kind of understand it now. I got the missing pieces of the puzzle from listening to Barry Long's recording of "Making Love".

Another short conversation

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Submitted by Louie on

For years my wife hated to talk about sex. In the last three weeks she has initiated two different conversations on the subject. These were not deep heart to heart talks or anything, but each one served to establish another level of understanding on the subject. Each one was sparked by an article that she read in the newspaper or online.

We had the talk

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Submitted by Louie on

Today I told my wife that I have been spacing out my ejaculations to the point where I only do it about twice a month, and I intend to continue with that trend and hopefully strech it out over time. I told her that I have noticed my mind is much sharper, my thinking is calmer and more clear, and my general outlook on life is much better when I do not ejaculate for a prolonged period of time. She told me she has noticed that I have been very upbeat the past few months. We have not been very sexually active in that time, so she would not know if I was ejaculating frequently or not.

The Value of this Community

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Submitted by Louie on

I have been on the path of sexual healing for about four years now. I started looking for answers when my son turned one year old. At that point my wife'e libido had been pretty much absent for 20 months (pregnancy and one year post-natal) and I was starting to realize that this was not just a matter of post-baby exhaustion. I was struggling to understand what had happened and I was looking for an internet community where I could discuss it with others.

Cowper's gland

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Submitted by Louie on

I was very intrigued by some recent posts about pre-cum. The thing that intrigued me was that several men who have been abstaining from ejaculation remarked that they do flow quite a bit of fluid from their cowper's gland during sex even though they do not ejaculate. The loss of this fluid does not seem to affect them too much.

A sudden change in the wind

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Submitted by Louie on

Tonight a very unexpected thing occured. I was sitting on the couch reading a book while my wife tucked the kids in. When she was done she came down stairs and stood in front of me. I cleared the stuff that was sitting beside me on the couch so she could sit. However, she surprised me by plopping down onto my lap. She smiled at me, and I kissed her, and we kissed for a while.

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