So it's been awhile since I've posted on this site. In the three years since I last blogged I've had a lot of victory over masturbation and the inevitable fallout. In late 2013/2014 I went for 5 months without bringing myself to ejaculation. It was a long hard road and since then I'll occasionally go for 2-3 month dry spells. I was also in a relationship where I experienced the power of affectionate touch. Such peace and contentment....and the incredible sleep I would have after I would cuddle with my sweetheart.
Spent the day helping my best friend and his wife move out of there townhouse. When your day is spent working and connecting with old friends it doesn't leave much room for masturbation. I felt pretty good all day. I also got to spend time chatting with Katie who took a day off from her pilgrim in Spain to rest up. She really wishes I could be with her and part of me does as well. As I'm typing this I've reached the 72 hour point and I feel that horny feeling coming on. There's definitely some activity going on in my nether regions and that uncomfortable tension is there.
Lethargy and laziness should be the word for today. Just a tiredness that isn't by any means overpowering, and even somewhat pleasant in the sense that I could probably fall asleep, but it certainly gets in the way when you've got stuff to get done. The only problem is I'm somewhat indifferent about getting it done and part of me is bothered by that while another part just doesn't care. An inability to concentrate is there too and I'm aware of this as well but also indifferent about it. This is typical of an orgasm hangover for me so it's predictable and I know this too shall pass.
Well I've been pretty good at keeping track of my orgasms. Because I've become so aware of their insidious effect I've managed to cut down to one a week at most. I went for a month without one back in March and more recently I went 17 days without one. I know that because I've never been involved with pornography it's been easier for me than it is for a lot of people (for those of you caught in it's grip I feel for you). I only have my natural sex drive at work which as a healthy 24 year old is pretty high.
After my month long abstinence ended I've been in a deluge of ejaculation. 5 this week already (all on separate days). After the second one I (who's incredibly careful about nutrition and who only drinks water) had 3 cheeseburgers and drank some root beer. For the most part I've felt pretty good all week. I suppose the frequent E's (frequent for me) have artificially kept my dopamine high. I had a relaxed feeling all day after #3. I know I'm going to pay for it this coming week.
I had brought myself to climax twice back on March 8th and found it so dissatisfying that I resolved to abstain. I've never been involved with pornography so there's very little in the way of temptation other than my own libido. Which at the age of 24 is pretty strong. My body seemed to realize I was abstaining. A week after my last bout of solo sex I had three wet dreams all within 24 hours of each other. That two weeks after that were a slog to get through but I made it. The past few days though I could feel myself getting "full" and my penis has become very sensitive.
The start of day 4 didn't go as I would have liked it. I always love the way morning masturbation feels when you've abstained for awhile. Your testosterone levels are higher in the morning and it just feels pleasurable instead of compulsive. I'm assuming because you're relaxed from just waking up you don't have the desire to just get off. You can ride the wave, back off, lose your erection if you want to and still feel alright. I didn't though, after my erection started going away I started thrusting into my mattress harder to bring it back. From there it was on to climax.
I masturbated twice Saturday night (making love to my bed face down) and while the act was not very enjoyable I felt very energetic/talkative on Sunday. I thought maybe I could get away with any ill effects but sadly it's not the case. I slept in until 11 this morning throwing my sleep routine off track. Ejaculation always leaves me very tired. I was a little horny today, let's face it masturbation always sounds like fun. Not looking forward to tomorrow as the third day is always the worse and when ever I abstain wet dreams are there to throw off the recovery process.