day 2: lonely, depressed, blah...

Submitted by Mr.NiceGuy on
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Well so far i've only had to deal with a few instances of fantasy, but it wasn't too hard to brush off. I haven't been tempted to look at porn yet, which I'm happy about. The thing is, I haven't left my house or hung with friends or anything all weekend and even today. I don't know what the deal is. I feel so lonely, but at the same time I feel terrified of being around a group of people (especially one with females) right now. I didn't always have this problem. I have to keep reassuring myself that this will pass, and that I'm not a pathetic loser.
It's been over a week since my last O, so I think a good portion of the "brain fog" is gone. Edging to porn for 2 hours every day without orgasm (up till yesterday) has probably left alot of brain fog still here though. I'm hoping it passes soon. I can see an immediate change in the way I look, the way I see myself, and the way other people see me when I have been masturbating to porn. Just looking in the mirror, I can see these dark puffy bags under each eye. Other people sometimes notice it and comment on the "zombie eyes." Fortunately, they are starting to disappear :)I'm in this for the long haul, no matter how long it takes. Hopefully not TOO long though..