Ah, so here we are day 90. Day 4 no O.
A bit to cover here. Saturday night my lady finally came over, and I wanted to make sure regardless of what willy wants to do, I was going to please her. I did. I bought some astroglide and gave her a full body massage and gave her three orgasms which left her trembling in my arms. But of course, I'm limp. As demoralizing as it was to be turned on, naked woman on the bed, one that SERIOUSLY wanted to please me, it was an easily discarded thought. I just did my best rendition of karezza my mind could think of and just fell asleep with eachother.
Now, the next morning I awake about 95% erect. Very confused because I was naked for a couple hours touching and feeling her body and just in a really sensual moment, relaxed, but still no life? Then I wake up with morning wood. Misleading, but regardless I decided: "So many weeks of no opportunity, erections and what have you. I'm going to see what she wants to do with this." So I started touching her and just caressing her and she felt me and woke up. She gave me head once she realized I was actually hard (her first time seeing it). It felt good, but not magical. Even though I came in like 15 seconds it felt like a good release. No chaser, hangover, or whatever. I couldn't help but feel a little uneasy about it all. 15 second bust, no hard on with her, but morning wood?.. This reboot is still a hike on everest, but my resolve to weather the storm still stands firm.
I do feel more sexually..."potent" you could say?..Maybe I should just say sexual, because I don't know if I'm flyin high or droppin low anymore. I just feel evened out, but still feel like my libido has been higher.
Anyway, day 90 is today and I say solemnly but optimistic, it still isn't over.