Day 90 still a while to go..

Submitted by riselikethephoenix09 on
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Ah, so here we are day 90. Day 4 no O.

A bit to cover here. Saturday night my lady finally came over, and I wanted to make sure regardless of what willy wants to do, I was going to please her. I did. I bought some astroglide and gave her a full body massage and gave her three orgasms which left her trembling in my arms. But of course, I'm limp. As demoralizing as it was to be turned on, naked woman on the bed, one that SERIOUSLY wanted to please me, it was an easily discarded thought. I just did my best rendition of karezza my mind could think of and just fell asleep with eachother.

Now, the next morning I awake about 95% erect. Very confused because I was naked for a couple hours touching and feeling her body and just in a really sensual moment, relaxed, but still no life? Then I wake up with morning wood. Misleading, but regardless I decided: "So many weeks of no opportunity, erections and what have you. I'm going to see what she wants to do with this." So I started touching her and just caressing her and she felt me and woke up. She gave me head once she realized I was actually hard (her first time seeing it). It felt good, but not magical. Even though I came in like 15 seconds it felt like a good release. No chaser, hangover, or whatever. I couldn't help but feel a little uneasy about it all. 15 second bust, no hard on with her, but morning wood?.. This reboot is still a hike on everest, but my resolve to weather the storm still stands firm.

I do feel more sexually..."potent" you could say?..Maybe I should just say sexual, because I don't know if I'm flyin high or droppin low anymore. I just feel evened out, but still feel like my libido has been higher.

Anyway, day 90 is today and I say solemnly but optimistic, it still isn't over.

Comments

Time with a woman

was a smart move. But maybe you should have turned down the oral sex for now. I know it seems crazy, but a slower, less driven approach can actually help your body find its way back to balance better sometimes.

Either way...you're on a collision course with success. Just be patient.

Always good advice Marnia,

maybe I should have let my erection fade away instead of insisting release. I just wanted to see the quality of the erection was going to be after all this time. I had questions. How hard am I? How long will it last? Things like that compelled me to try and maybe that is the reason I lasted a short amount of time. I don't know, I never do throughout this reboot. The only thing I can accurately analyze is how I am feeling in the moment. I hope this collision is around the corner.

I feel how they say: So close and yet, so far away.

Well, probably

any of us would have done the same thing. Wink

You're also right that putting your attention on her, rather than your penis and goals, tends to help a lot. Did you read the section on relaxation helping erections? Tips For Former Fappers This makes perfect sense in light of what we learned about "normal" erections using oxytocin and parasympathetic nervous system activation. http://www.reuniting.info/wisdom/neotaoism_and_karezza

Remember, sensitized pathways hammer the reward circuit by other means, which is why porn overrides the normal arousal-satiation process. We've learned a lot about this since we wrote the book: Why Do I Find Porn More Exciting Than A Partner? And there's no doubt way more to learn!

what up homie

We've had similar progress so I thought I'd share my recent experiences. Day 105 for me. Expect some progress in the next 2-3 weeks. About 10-14 days ago, I had 2 wet dreams in a row. Felt flatlined for about 5 days but now I'm legit horny and need some sex. I feel like my brain has completely unwired from porn. I was surprised about the wet dreams, but momentum keeps building. Your BJ prob wasn't that big of a deal. If it lasted 15 secs, It was prob equivalent to my WD's. Hold off for another month and I bet you'll be good. It'll be subtle. You won't feel like the Hulk (at least not all the time), you'll just start fantasizing and suddenly be like "goddamn I need sex!". I can feel how I'm going to need to rewire- I still don't fully trust myself. But it's happening. I'm gonna try to hold off another month and do everything perfect (meditation, kegels, etc.), but if the situation presents itself I'm gonna give that girl the most satisfying 30 seconds of her life. My general level of feeling has jumped significantly in the past 2 weeks. Aim for Day 110 and see how you feel. Good luck man.

appreciate that bro,

yea sounds like your comin along then. i just can't figure out why the fuck i can't get it up in the moment but the next morning i have a full on wood. it's whatever, movin on. but if you say it's on the uphill the next few weeks, i think i'm gonna be aight. i know what you mean though. even though i want to last at least five minutes, i'll take what i can get.

thanks man, back at you.