No Partner but seeing a pattern

Submitted by SingleCurious on
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Being single and living alone with not a lot of outside interaction, I am able to pinpoint the 'hangover' behaviours to the day after I have self satisfied myself with an orgasm. I am aware of this to the point that I actually stop myself knowing that it could interfere with relationships and interactions I will have with people. So I wait until I know there will be sufficient time between the orgasm and the effects of the 'hangover' where I won't need to interact with people.

This may sound crazy, but my dog, senses the moods and she persists in attempting to get me to play with her until I cannot resist and as soon as I begin to interact (throwing the ball for her is her favourite), my mood will swing and I begin to get feelings of love and a desire to pat her.

Similarily, one of my cats, since birth would not allow anyone to touch her. Since we have been living alone, she has acquired the ability to come to, especially at times when she senses the separation and steps up for me to pat her - she is about 6 y.o. and the behaviour is very new for her, it is also a new living situation where we live in harmony - me, 1 dog, 1 female cat and 1 male cat.

So I don't think the model is just sexually oriented, but relates to interaction amongst all living things.

In the past, I did have a partner that was willing to explore Tantric but eventually gave up, didn't seem to have the will power to maintain sexual sobriety. He is an addict and has given up *some* of the heavier addictions, but still smokes cigarettes and the other stuff that plays havoc with your brain.

I can only also assume it is more intense with some than with others and I question (and have experimented) if it is the intensity of the orgasm... for example in last decade when I was going through menopause I found orgasm to be comforting and sometimes I'd go for a period of time without it then I'd orgasm until I couldn't orgasm any more... the aftermath was way more intense and full of rage at times. I could get so mad over things I'd look back and be astounded at it as would people around me, describing me as being ludicrus and insane.

My house is peaceful now, there has been a consequence to not knowing this until now in that I have difficulties getting into and maintaining relationships.

This also totally fascinating to me in that I have a neice that has been diagnosed with many labeled neurosis. She is in her 30's and still requires a good deal of care which my 67 y.o. sister administers with the support of family and friends. One of the things my sister acknowledged one day was that her daughter was masterbating a lot (she could hear her at all times of the day and night in her room). Afterward, she'd become rageful and angry and even physically assault her mother if could not have her way (like get money from her to go out or go shopping or get her mother to stop what she is doing - even if she is working). We've talked about both, but I don't recall relating the two and seeing a pattern there.

Comments

Circulating ..

Thanks for the advice I will pass it along to my sister for my neice.

The articles are rich with information and very helpful as well.

I will continue today and begin Day 1 today while reading and enhancing my understanding.

Thank you