It has struck me that I am on a forum primarily designed for those who actually have a sexual relationship of some type with a partner.
I do not.. haven't for over a year and a half and it really looks like my prospects for a intimate relationship that has any sexual content is many months away at best.
Even more striking to me is that I don't seem to be overly concerned about this. Well I will say now that I have said this I am a bit concerned about a loss of libido.
No PMO ... which obviously is a solo endeavor .. has changed my outlook considerably when I. .. "covet".
Many of you know what I mean by covet.. it used to be a substantial part of my sexual addiction... The tight pants..skirt or sweater.. younger women .. older women . .
Coveting was a primary driver of my libido.. often pushing me or triggering my need for a fix.
Now this has changed. I still recognize a beautiful woman but the knee jerk (hehe) reaction of need is no longer there.
I feel my core stir a tiny bit.. but I don't run with the thought or feeling.
I wasn't a crazy maniac before ... I never acted on my covets...just fantasy at worst.. and I never coveted with my wife present. .disrespectful .. I felt like this periodic coveting helped keep me manly and hungry. But now I realize it just caused more self suffering.
Now I have a lot of time to myself but have come to the realization that it is OK to recognize beauty in all walks of life without coveting to fuck them.
I just don't elaborate on the recognition of beauty and covet an unhealthy object of desire.
Why I am mentioning this in a karezza forum is because I believe there is a lesson here for even those who have partners.
I would covet my own wife as just a sexual object rather than a soul connected lover.
I was so out of touch with my body I could only have unconnected sex with her as an object .. not much different than my masturbation to porn.
So people pursuing karezza.. I think the first hurdle is to realize you are loving a beauitiful soul you can feel in your heart ... don't be distracted by the window dressing.
It seems like the seductive nature in how women dress to impress each other and the overall cultural prevalence of sex in movies, advertising, music.. etc. encourages this objective cold superficial super sexual seduction as what love and intimacy is.. and I am on to their little game.
All of this may be obvious to most.. but not to me.. like realuzing karezza kind of needs two people. I am working on this too. :)