Sunday my Isadora left town to help our daughter with her new baby. I'll go over there Thursday night or Friday. Home alone Sunday, Monday and this night. Each night I have cruised the TV over to Cinesex for about an hour each time.
(I also have my clothes and work papers all over the place. The dishes are dirty and I've been eating sloppy. I've gotten nothing of purpose done.)
The TV sex is soooo fake. But God, I love seeing those naked women acting like they love having sex. I love being hard. No problem to not masturbate. Today, on my way home, I said, "That's enough" but there I was again tonight.
I want to be a loving husband. I want my wife to feel the love when I look at her....when I touch her. How can that be when I have such a deep pull to the carnal?
I wish strength and compassion to all who struggle.
On the other hand (honest, I didn't use either one) I have learned some really valuable stuff here. I am a loving man. I no longer confuse love and lust.