Hello. I've been experimenting by trying to avoid orgasms for 30 days and see what effects it has on my mood. I've been able to abstain for 11 consecutive days until I stayed over my fiancé's place. I didn't expect that he'd give me oral sex that day, and afterwards, I've been trying to explain why we shouldn't engage in conventional sex or "flirt with an edge" for a period of time because of my experiment. However, we had sex again a couple of days later, but this time, he performed oral sex on me in his sleep. ("Surprise sex"?)
My question is how do I calm down my fiancé when he does this at night? He'll do certain things like kissing, groping, humping, fingering, and sometimes oral sex, but he doesn't know what he's doing 'til he wakes up in the middle of it.
What can I do to get him to slow down and ease the sexual tension he feels in his genitals when he's "sleep-humping"?