I have a question?

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Submitted by darkinside on
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Almost 3 years ago I fooled around with some girl in bar (was my first real kiss). Well that time I've got excited (boner), although I was drunk. Then 2 years later with my girlfriend I had first kiss with her, nothing happened. I panicked, I mean, I really love this girl,she is my sweetie, and not to mention she is sooooo hot! Am I going to have problem in bed? I mean come on let's face it, if I can get aroused when we kiss very passiontly...
Well, I do use porn, and masturbate..It happened ughh very long time ago.
First time I masturbate was about 9-10 years ago (I was around 13). I was thinking of Uma Thurman!
Then very fast I moved on pictures with naked women,then escalated to more explicit pictures and finally in just 2 years advanced on movies. I've bought porn magazines with DVDs and so on..until around 5 years ago internet came in my house..
I found more movies I could possibly looked. And in past half year I noticed that if I wanted to get aroused, I had to look transsexual porn. I mean I'm not gay!
Well I said that's enough!
I can get aroused when I look at porn,but when I want to get aroused with my girlfriend it's nothing.
So I've decided to stop with porn and stop with masturbation. I'm on day 3 yaay!
I have to mention that I tried to stop with my addiction before,but I've failed miserably!
Sorry for my bad english,it's not my mother tongue :)
So my question is, can i be fixed? Will I get my boner when I will make out with my girlfriend?

Hope for your support, I'll try to brief you with my progress.

I think if you stick with the

I think if you stick with the reboot/rewire process you will be ok. It might take a while though, and you may flatline (no boner) for quite a while. Maybe you should consider telling your girlfriend what is going on so she knows and doesn't get mad if you can't perform.


Hey, remember, you have a tounge and this appendage you are in control of. Many, many women prefer a skilled tounge over a hard dick, anyway. If you like this girl so much, pleasure her any way you can as you reboot. Don't forget your hands, women love a long massage, feet, head, back, the whole body. Ive, said it elsewhere, men think women want performance but what they really want is connection and masculine presence. We think performance is what a woman wants because this is what us men expect between men, its all about performance. Remember, you're having sex with a woman who's make up is much different than you.

You say, "Am I going to have a problem in bed?", only if you make it one. The problem is not your limp dick but you're limp frame of mind. When you contract in on yourself in fear, insecurity, and self doubt, THIS is what is least attractive to a woman. Don't make her reassure you that you are still desirable, or push her away because you think she will of you. Show her that SHE is desirable, you have a whole body to demonstrate it with besides your penis.

As you become intimate and connected in a heart way your penis will, in time, respond appropriate.

Stick with the reboot. I went

Stick with the reboot. I went through the same porn advancement and had trouble with arousal around actual girls. Once I spend a few weeks away from porn, I'm getting erections just by looking at an attractive girl. I've made a lot of progress over the past year and have gone months at a time without porn, but it's a long journey to recovery after looking at porn for 15 years.

Thanks to all for your

Thanks to all for your support and advice.
@James2568 I don't think I'll tell my girlfriend about my problem right now, I'm thinking of telling her in the middle of the process
@Darryl You're right, sex can be performed orally, manual etc. Wink
@PornAddictTim Guys like you gave me inspiration to go on this road, and thank you for your support it really means a lot to me
@Marnia thank you for link..actually I've read almost the whole site, but it doesn't hurt to read it twice or more..maybe I even find some information I've skipped or forgot the last time I've read it.