It has been awhile since I was able to sustain clarity and focus for over 50 days. Feels good. Feels real good. I hate relapsing. I even hate the idea of it. Just finished up Summer School and will soon be starting up Fall Semester. Other then that... not much to say.
I guess things have been going really well for me. Staying busy at work and still working towards my degree. Physically I am in the best shape I have ever been in. Pretty muscular (not overly muscular) but still keeping my body fat % under 8% using a Carb-Cycling diet along with a lot of gym time. Been doing a lot of side jobs to accumulate some extra cash to spend on some new outfits or my arsenal of shoes. Before I would just spend that money on drugs,porn and massage parlors. The only thing I am missing is a woman! Which brings me to my next point.
I am really in need of a woman. Not just for sex and for the sake of releasing this energy that has been brewing inside me for the last 50 days, but for the sake of love. I need a woman's love. A woman to enjoy the simple things in life with. Sounds corny I know. Ok, I will stop now. Anyways, plenty of woman at college. Though I am not really aggressively pursuing things. Whatever happens happens. In the meantime I will focus on my education and just becoming an overall better person.
I should note that my sex drive has been very active in the last week or two. On weekends when I don't have to wake up at the crack of dawn I will often wake up with a full blown erection. I will even stroke myself for a few minutes using my imagination of REAL woman, not porn. Of course I have not reached orgasm. Just want to make sure things are still working down there and they are definitely are. LOL
Oh... and I am still shocked I haven't had a wet dream yet. As I have noted in previous posts... I have NEVER had a wet dream in my life, which goes to show how much I have masturbated since...well...puberty. Even when I have gone over 75 days without PMO I never had a nocturnal emission. I find this to be a bit weird as I am still in my twenties and extremely healthy. I do not want to have any type of "Masturbation Schedule" until I have a few wet dreams. If I can figure out the time span between wet dreams I will have a better idea of what is my "natural" orgasm cycle.
P.S. I forgot to mention... one of the best parts about being abstinent from PMO is the control I have over my emotions. As mentioned in previous posts I have had several altercations with coworkers. It feels GREAT not getting all worked up in a fuss over a silly comment, a rude remark, a terrible driver on the road that cut you off etc. I also enjoy the intellectual confidence. I may not be the smartest person on this blog, but not doubting your own intelligence is huge when your taking rather difficult classes in school such as Calculus or Computer Programming (two classes that I am taking this semester.)