It has been awhile since I've blogged here, but I finally feel I have a few things to write about, so I thought I'd give it a go...I'll write about the other things in separate posts. This one is about bliss.
Our lovemaking has become so easy and the only word I can think of to describe it is bliss. Other words for it could be "samadhi" or "satori" or "ananda"~~these are states of presence I've read and learned about that can be achieved during lovemaking when you are able to leave your mind behind. This state of leaving the mind behind is what draws us to sex in the first place; the ability to get out of our minds and just be in our bodies. It is blissful to just *be* with no expectations and nothing but ecstasy.
For me, it is no longer such an effort to stay in my body and out of mind, partly because I try to practice this all throughout the day, not just during lovemaking. The more I do it, the longer I am able to stay out of my mind, the easier it becomes. I know I am doing it right when a huge feeling of peace and love comes over my body. What comes over me is pure contentment and a feeling of being in a divine state with my lover.
To quote Osho, "In a deep orgasmic state, time disappears, mind disappears, ego disappears. And because these three things disappear, great joy arises. That arising of joy has nothing to do with sex either; it is because sex helped, became a context for the disappearance of the ego, mind and time."
Sometimes I have what feels like a hallucination of sorts during lovemaking; I can relax so completely, go to my third eye, and just let waves of love come over me to the point where I can see a white light that spreads a beautiful glow over our bodies and this glow is there whether I have my eyes opened or closed. Everything is so quiet and surreal and I know this will sound strange, but I can feel the presence of *something* in the room with us...there is a feeling of stillness and sacredness and at this time I will usually give a prayer of thanks (and sometimes my eyes will well up with grateful tears).
There are other times where we are both giving to each other the most we have available to give...it's an energy exchange of yin and yang and it pulsates and seems to last forever and then it's done. And then we are done because we gave all we had to give. But while this is happening it's like that warm, fuzzy feeling you get before having an orgasm (well, for a woman, I'm not sure what a man feels), but it lasts and lasts and there is no peak and no drop. And then it just stops. And when it stops you feel complete and you are ready to go on about your day or go to sleep.
All of this has become like medicine to both of us. Not only do we want it, but we need it. It's essential to our partnership and to our happiness. There isn't much else that holds as much importance in our lives as our time together making love. It's what makes everything else meaningful...we always put our time together first. The joy it brings us spills over into our everyday lives and truly makes life worth living. I feel so blessed to have my lover and to be able to share this bliss with him. I realize this is the first person with whom I've ever truly made love and I just feel so fortunate that I've been able to experience this in my lifetime.