Coworker JUST discovered porn at age 37...his life is crumbling before him. Masturbating in the company car while driving.

Submitted by Confinement84 on
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Ya. I thought that title would get your attention. A coworker of mine is your typical construction worker. A real a-hole, rude and disrespectful. He also had very little understanding or knowledge about computers so watching porn was out of the question without going to an old fashion porn store. A few months ago the company handed out new smart phones for Navigation to employees who did not already have one. It was only a matter of time before he discovered the magical world of porn. The other day he was driving down the road in a company car and masturbating on the highway WITH another coworker in the car. That is when you know you have problems.

The life of porn is already destroying his relationship with his wife. He was in a screaming match with his wife over the phone at the job site talking about kicking her out of their house. One coworker chimed in and said " go home make up with her and stick it in her butt" (sorry for the graphic wording.) My coworker responds with ... " I don't even want to. I am bored of her. I rather go home and jack-off to porn." LOL. He was 100% serious when he made that statement, you could see it in his face. When he said that I was immediately thinking that his porn addiction was killing his relationship. If only he knew. I wouldn't dare preach to him about porn or as he would probably laugh in my face. I guess some people have to learn the hard way right? If at all.

By the way. I have been PMO free for 73 days now. I STILL have not had a wet dream. It is mind boggling that I can go so long without an orgasm. I guess my body needs to refill on ammo after years of practice at the shooting range. Today ends the first week of School. SOOOOO many woman at school.... Oh, my truck has been having major issues. Runs but doesn't run great. I guess there is an issue with my hydraulic lifter in cylinder 3 which means I need to cough up 3000 dollars for a new engine. The mechanic says to ride my truck til the wheels fall off but by the time Smog-check time rolls around next year I will either need to buy a truck or replace the engine on this one. Honestly? I just don't have the money to drop on another work truck. More motivation to work hard at school and get my degree ASAP in Computer Science.

Day 00 here I come!


Porn kills, y'all!

That co-worker sounds like he is in a bad place. And sometimes, I feel that while certain people I know would "get" Karezza, even if they are wary about practicing it, others would immediately reject it. I hate to say that I agree with you that your co-worker wouldn't get it. But maybe he'd be more open to the "Your Brain on Porn" articles linked through here, because what happened to him should be a real wake-up call.
Congratulations on your own progress. And just let the thought, "Oh she's cute" or "Oh, she's hot" pass through your mind. DOn't get caught up in fantasizing or arguing with it; just smile, nod, and let it go. I even like to add "And the sky is blue" after troubling thoughts to put them in their place and let them through. It makes the thought less threatening or compelling, for some reason.

Thanks. I definitely let the

Thanks. I definitely let the "Oh she's so cute" thoughts pass through my mind, against Marnia's wishes (sorry Marnia I am still a pansy.) I actually had quite a few woman at the first day of school attempt to get me to notice them. I know the process all too well now. They look back, make eye-contact and mess with their hair to get your attention. One woman I swear was staring at me the whole time in Political Science class it actually made me feel a bit uncomfortable. LOL. I also get the feeling that I intimidate a lot of woman. In high school I never really had to ask a woman out as they would always initiate conversations. Now it appears I have to grow up, be a man and ask them out I feel they are putting themselves out there for me to make first contact (sounds like something from a sci-fi movie.)

I just feel so confused in my shoes at times. Part of me knows I am handsome, muscular/lean, and has the outfits to physically impress girls at school, but it is nothing more then physical attraction. I feel like if a woman gets to know me too well they realize I am not nearly awesome as I may appear. For example, I have a work truck (my only vechicle) and it is slowly falling apart at this point. I would be embarrassed to take a woman out on a date in that thing, let alone let them see it. I dress like I have a decent job but they would probably be greatly disappointed to find that I am a construction worker making 20 dollars/hr. I also do not have many friends which makes any conversation feel more awkward. Most of my old friends stayed in a life of drugs, those are friends I can't afford to be around, thus making me the odd man out.

I feel like to due to years and years of marijuana and porn abuse I have lost a lot of confidence in myself. I feel like my anxiety stems from this past abuse. The good news is... I have been feeling a whole lot better about myself in the last 1.5 years when I started my War on Porn. Hopefully I will reach a tipping point where I can feel confident about myself, like I did when I was 13-14. And I think that tipping point can only be reached if I NEVER look at porn again. Going 60 days clean then relapsing isn't good enough... like I have done many times before.

Hey Gorgeous

I just want to tell you some things...even though you aren't really hearing them yet. Dash 1

You are not "just" anything. You are a god. (I happen to think we all have a spark of our creator, so that goes for everyone.) BUT, you are actually an amazing god. Any thinking woman would be enormously impressed with your "self-made" status...of having the courage to work your way through school and shift to a career that uses your bright mind.

I wish you'd allow your transformation to reach your opinion of yourself. I've been watching you turn from caterpillar to butterfly, and I can tell you that you are a remarkable man. Your writing has become lively and expressive. Your determination is impressive. Your level of wisdom higher than those who don't go through such enormous challenges.

But apparently, you haven't gotten the memo! Wink Until you replace the negative self-talk with appreciation for your wonderful qualities, no amount of achievement will be enough. Self-esteem is an inside job. Start talking to your mirror and telling yourself what a fine human being you are. Because you are.

And don't wait to ask women out. Choose a date where you meet her some place first. Once she hears your story she won't think a thing of the truck. (Hope you find a cheap solution to the problem, BTW. Can you trade some of your IT or other skills with a mechanic who could help you??)

Practice your dating skills while you're in school, surrounded by women. That's the time to get the kinks out of your game.

*big hug*

What Marnia said

I teach at a state university and a lot of adults are going back to school to change careers. Don't beat yourself up about that. College really is the time to try out social and dating skills, because it is easy to meet so many young, single people. A lot of people are going to be in the same boat as you; they are working to put themselves through school, they are on financial aid, they need to budget. A college student will be a lot happier with a nice pizza and dancing, hearing an up-and-coming band, or going to a lecture or free/inexpensive college activity than a woman who is successful in her career and expects a man to match, if not exceed her in spending ability.
Also, don't underestimate the worth and attractiveness of self-improvement and ambition to other people. You are taking positve steps to change your life. You want more for yourself, not just in terms of career and money, but also quality of spiritual/emotional life. Also a man who is competent at some kind of physical skill (working on cars, plumbing, etc) is very attractive. You're a construction worker? That means you're comfortable and competent with tools; you build stuff that people need. YOU BUILD STUFF, YO. That is a real skill to be proud of.
Depending on the kind of free time you have, join a campus group to meet people where you can make friends, so you don't feel lonely. Again, college is a great place for this because of the range of people and interests there, the support from the administration for activities, etc. Whether it's a recreational sports league, a political or religous group, a hobby, etc., it will help you meet both women and men to be friends with. It sounds like you need some good guy friends who won't pull you back into the past, and other guys who like to play a recreational sport or chess or run a food drive or whaterver would be good for you.