I don't really know where to start here. Apologies if this is disorganized.
I've been aware of karezza/ post orgasm principles thanks to stumbling across this amazing website a couple of years ago. I've been in my current relationship for three years.
My partner is really not into the idea of karezza. I can see how conventional sex affects our relationship and our lives. I get depressed and have a really hard time academically (still in college). He tends to get more easily frustrated and have a harder time concentrating at work. Normal life 'stuff' gets more overwhelming for both of us. Over a year ago we tried to give karezza more of a try. I remember what it was like to actually have energy for life. I can't really fathom that right now.
The thing is that when we were "trying" karezza, I was the only one that wanted it, and it felt like a constant battle. I was a gatekeeper during the act, with him driving to get to that goal of orgasm. And then he would shut down sex entirely for a while, going off to use porn etc. We would go a couple of months without it. I broke up with him 3 times because we were so sexually incompatible. We always got back together somehow. We were both thinner, practicing yoga, in really great shape and eating healthy. (seemingly without effort, almost magnetically/gravitationally) Even though it was not perfect karezza that we practiced, and there was tension/lots of stress about it, it made a huge difference in our bodies and energy levels. Now we lay around all day and eat horrible food and can barely get basic household tasks done.
The last time we got back together, I had no more energy to fight. I gave up any talk of karezza entirely. Conventional sex has been all it's been for a year now, and I don't know what to do. I told him a few days ago that I just want to avoid orgasm myself for a few weeks to see if it helps me academically. I am trying to avoid pressuring him to avoid that 'war' feeling coming back. I think this feels more positive than all the attempts I made to pressure him and force him to do what I wanted regardless. The problem is, it's really hard to not get too 'into things' if he is not on board at all. Agh. This is basically the place I've been in for the last year. At this point I'm not even looking for the bliss/magnetism/exchange of love some of you describe experiencing with karezza, I just want to get off the orgasm roller coaster/hell without making the sexual aspect of our relationship fraught with tension (again) over the conflict around this issue.
P.S. - Thank you so much for putting this information out there. I have been lurking on this website for two years and even though I'm not practicing this 'properly' at all, it shines a light on so much of life for me. I never would have remotely guessed there was a post orgasm cycle that affected people so dramatically in all these different ways unless I had found this website. So thank you, so much.