"What strikes me the most about this whole process is how quick and dramatic the changes were for us. We went from being your typical 20-year married couple to completely open-hearted, always at the ready, 24x7 lovers, in a matter of days! This magnitude of change, occurring in such a short time frame cannot be the result of any sort of cognitive process; that can take years. This is clearly a neurochemical and/or hormonal related process. If there was a pill you could buy to do that, it would be on the front page of every magazine and in a t.v. commercial at every break. But since it's inside every one of us and free, we never hear about it. Such a shame....
From my recent experiments with non-orgasmic sex, I'm tempted to view orgasm and its associated hangover as "the matrix" (think the 1999 movie) whose effects marketers can use to manipulate us. It reminds me of this quote from the movie:
The Matrix is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work… when you go to church… when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth. … That you are a slave, Neo. Like everyone else you were born into bondage. Born into a prison that you cannot smell or taste or touch. A prison for your mind.
For those who haven't experienced the difference between conventional fertilization-based sex and Karezza, that might sound like an extreme analogy, but the way orgasm changes my energy level, outlook, emotional state, availability for connection, satisfaction with my marriage, with life, etc. is so dramatic and essentially unconscious, I think the analogy fits."
If you want to know more about the practice, you may wish to check out:
- the links below, which contain much collective wisdom about karezza from forum visitors
- Lovers' Ultimate Sex Hack: Karezza or What Is Karezza?, introductory articles
- news stories from around the world about karezza (If you like the karezza concept and you want to spread awareness remember to "like" the stories you read on your favorite social media.)
- Reddit.com's FAQs on Karezza
- our collection of people's' Karezza Journeys (new)
- What do women say about karezza experiences?
- What do men say about karezza experiences?
- What is the man's role in karezza?
- What's the woman's role in karezza?
- Explaining this to a date or partner
- What source materials about karezza help?
- Why you need to focus on yourself during karezza
- How can I get wet without foreplay?
- Anyone have lubricant suggestions?
- Karezza in Four Easy Steps (for men)
- How do you keep karezza "warm" so it doesn't get too "hot?"
- Karezza positions, timing, tips, etc.
- Tips for beginners
- Honeymoon neurochemistry
- Mixing karezza and conventional sex
- Advice to young guys experimenting with karezza
- Won't I be bored?
- How can I have pleasure in my penis/body without orgasm?
- Orgasm hangover?
- Is there a way to minimize the hangover if you experience one?
- Intense cravings for more stimulation after orgasm (the "chaser")
- Karezza Slogans
- Do lasting relationships make sense as a goal?
- What do you do when you don't have enough time for karezza?
- Scheduling encounters to increase harmony
- Karezza is for addicts (too)
- Can karezza help heal women's sexual wounds?
- Non-goal-oriented sex eases ED
- How do you know when karezza lovemaking is complete?
- Practicing karezza when you have children
- Why I don't miss orgasmic sex
- Importance of frequent encounters
- Advice to young guy experimenting with karezza
- Does karezza increase sexual responsiveness?
- Does karezza increase male "neediness?"
- Too much energy? Should you use the "Exchanges" in Cupid's Poisoned Arrow?
- Some questions concerning Karezza (from an 18-year old)
- Discussion of prostatic fluids
- Surprise orgasms
- Vaginal pain during intercourse
- Does soft entry work?
- How much movement?
- How do I get him to slow down?
- What about blue balls?
- How do I get my wife on board?
- Can a woman do Karezza if the man isn't into it?
- Partner-based birth control
- Karezza and kids
- Karezza and condoms
- The role of the breasts in female responsiveness
- How important is "chemistry" with a prospective lover?
- Long-distance Karezza?
- What helps while solo?
- Karezza in casual sexual relationships
- How to recover from a sexless marriage
- What about oral sex and karezza?
- Sleep karezza
- Karezza challenges
- Should women have all the orgasms they want before trying karezza?
- Gay couple's karezza experience
- Just bonding behaviors when starting a relationship
- Bonding behaviors during a relationship
- Random karezza benefits
- Karezza as spiritual practice
- Karezza, tantra, Daoist sexual cultivtation discussion
- Can I track our lovemaking?
- Harmony Index (Has karezza benefitted your relationship?)
- Are there karezza groups in my area?
Said one karezza practitioner:
Karezza seems like an expanded balloon to me. You can pressure it up to a certain level and play with it, but the trick is, don’t over blow and don’t release. Then intercourse can become a marvelous dance that has no real definable limits, except perhaps, not to reach orgasm. It just goes on and on, a beautiful joyous communion.
Another man replied:
I am glad you mentioned the balloon. Several years ago (before karezza) I used a balloon and a helium tank to explain to my wife how my orgasms worked. We would time our orgasms, so we could orgasm together, and sometimes when I was "ahead" of her I would need her to slow down (she was usually on top) to let me recover a bit. I would inflate the balloon until it almost popped and then release some of the helium and then I would refill it. I did this several times to show her how it worked. After several inflation/deflation cycles I let it fill up till it popped, BANG! BOOM! orgasm, dead balloon...... I did this to help her better understand how once I had my orgasm it was all over. "No more, done, finished, it's over, sorry about your luck." Now that we are practicing Karezza the balloon does get a bit inflated from time to time but being aware of what is happening an not "over-inflating" the balloon is what it is all about now. There is no more "done, finished, it's over, sorry about your luck," which is what we are finding to be the beauty of Karezza. Both of us come away feeling satisfied and bonded not leaving either one out in the cold, helpless, in need, and unsatisfied.