I apologize for the long post but not sure how to summarize this. I rebooted once and fully recovered in about 2 months. This was in January 2012. The link to that is below:
I was recovered to a point where I felt invincible... stupid, I know. I was able to get hard erections all the time and then I got back into my downward spiral- the dreaded PMO. I was into PMO on a very regular basis...maybe every 2 or 3 days but long sessions. Then 6 months later in August 2012 after my full recovery, I was getting worse again. I kept telling myself I could take a couple weeks off and get back to normal. That kept getting postponed, I continued my PMO and it started gradually getting worse.
In March I took 3 weeks off and saw a pretty good improvement- barely any TV to trigger urge, no dating sites, and of course no P. After the 3 weeks I had a 85-90% erection and PMOed. I continued PMO every couple days for a month then decided I needed a drastic change. Starting in the end of April, I told myself no PMO. I was very good but continued browsing dating sites a lot, regularly but stopped this after a month. Then a month later, I felt about 70-80% healed but you can never be sure. I was able to get almost a full erection just thinking of a girl. This was 2 months in then I gave in and PMOed 3 times in a week and felt back to feeling as bad as I was.
The last time I PMOed was July 5th so it's been about 40 days now. I browsed dating sites during this time but decided to stop a few days ago. I've been getting erections at times when I'm on dates and getting many half spontaneous erections when sitting down at work, train, etc. but not standing ..not sure if anyone knows what I mean. I get semihard erections when kissing but I feel off. I don't have wet dreams and haven't ejaculated in 40 days and I feel semen leaking when I urinate. About two weeks ago I felt like I was fully healed. That went away the next day. I haven't felt that good since. My question is do I need to/will I experience a flatline to fully heal and when can I try to get oral and or have sex. This has been very depressing and mentally tough. I'm not sure if I should try to rewire with a girl or wait until a certain point.
I appreciate your feedback. Thanks.